How I Am Surviving The Crazy Energy

Well, we’re back in full throes of the silly season, AKA Christmas.

For the Empaths of the world, this time of year can affect us in some weird and wonderful ways.

I don’t know about you, but each year I seem to have a different December experience. One year might be up, and another might be down, emotionally, physically and energetically. I may want to celebrate the festive season one year, and then the next I may want to avoid it and get away to the sunshine.

This year has been a bit of a one-off. In that it has been kind of hectic, but in a positive way, with lots of socialising and meeting up with friends.  (So much so, it has been difficult to find the time to write a post.) But I have to say I have thoroughly enjoyed it thus far (I know, we still have a way to go yet 😉), and I feel my daily habits are what have kept me so uplifted and in balance.

I wanted to check in with you all because I know how challenging the month of December can be. Not only with all the fluctuating stress energy of the populace, but with lack of daylight, cold weather, and with all the illnesses being passed around.

Because there is so much more stress in the air, it can be difficult for an Empath to stay centred, and things can often become overwhelming. And I know only too well what that feels like.

Within this month, many Empaths feel like they are experiencing a daily emotional and physical hangover, especially in the Northern hemisphere.

Yet, even those Empaths in the sunnier climates may still struggle with December energies.

I remember, many years ago, spending Xmas in Australia, where it is their summer, and I still experienced the similar physical and emotional sensations as I did when in the UK.

So, in case you’re wondering, here are some of the physical and emotional sensations some Empaths experience during this hectic period.

  • Fatigue
  • Headaches
  • Becoming overly emotional
  • Stress
  • Nausea
  • Feeling flu-ish without actually getting flu

There are many more symptoms you could experience. And, yes, I understand all of the above can actually be related to other things or indeed illness. But for many Empaths, having strange physical and emotional symptoms can be a common December theme.

Why Does It Happen?

In my opinion, it is all the different types of stress energy that triggers different responses within us Empaths. Stress can cause many problems within the body.

Most adults in the world experience some type of hassle over Christmas, whether that’s financial, physical, or just having a never-ending to-do list. As you know only too well, stress energy is hard to avoid for those of us who pick up on the energy of others.

The Solution

For that reason, I am sharing with you what I do daily, in the hopes it might help you too…

The following work an absolute treat for keeping me balanced, grounded and happy. And has, so far, helped get me through the silly season.

Hopefully, you’ll be able to find a trick or two that might help you too.

Getting Morning Light

I wrote about the incredible benefits I experienced by daylighting, earlier in the year. It is something I still do every day. No matter the weather, I get outside first thing in the morning, when it’s light, for at least 20 minutes. If it’s raining, I sit under my umbrella. If the conditions are really bad, I open the patio door and see the daylight from there.

I know my neighbours must think I’m completely bonkers (still haven’t got around to telling them what I’m doing), sitting there outside in all weathers, but it has worked a treat for rebalancing, and continues to do so.

I also nip out for snacks of light throughout the day, just for a few minutes.

As a side note, studies have shown that getting vitamin D, especially when absorbed from morning light, raises oxytocin levels. Oxytocin is the feel-good hormone that is super-beneficial to have at this time of year.

Daily Earth Grounding

This is also something I do every morning when I go out to get my morning light.

I usually wear my flip flops to go outside. I flick them off, before placing my bare feet on the grass (yes, it is cold, but bearable).

I realise that the problem many of you have with external winter grounding is the extremely cold earth, especially when there’s a layering of snow or frost. This is where grounding gadgets come in, such as grounding mats or shoes, etc.

I have a grounding mat that I use when the weather is too cold or too wet. Again, I put my bare feet on it. But generally, you have to spend more time on a grounding mat, than you do on the natural earth, to get the full benefits.

You can easily buy grounding mats and products off the internet.

There is a website here in the UK that sells grounding stuff: www.groundology.co.uk Although I have not yet bought anything from them, they seem to come highly recommended. Grounding mats, Grounding Yoga and Fitness mat (groundology.co.uk)

Protective Crystals

When I am out and about in peopled places, I usually wear my crystal bracelets (when I remember to put them on 😉).

Haematite used to be my go-to grounding stone, because it is both grounding and mirroring, and is protective when in busy or stressed places (basically everywhere over the festive period). But I now have another favourite, Black Tourmaline. Not only because it is protective and grounding, but because it is great for EMF protection.

EMF is quietly causing more problems in our world than you may realise. We can’t see it, but just like negative energy, many Empaths are taken down by EMF, and it is known to cause many health problems.

If you don’t own any crystal jewellery, keeping a piece of Black Tourmaline or Haematite with you at all times is a good way to shield yourself from unwanted energy and EMF.

If you want to learn more about the benefits of crystals for an Empath, see here.

Salt Lamps

Salt is so healing and grounding for the body and mind. I am a big fan of using salt, both inside and outside the body. I even drink a couple of glasses of salt water daily.

But something I find incredibly beneficial to use, at this time of year, is Himalayan salt lamps. I have two of them in my bedroom, and use them as bedside lamps.

I turn the salt lamps on a couple of hours before bedtime. And not only do they change the ambience of the bedroom, instantly making the room more relaxing, but they infuse the air with negative ions, which are known to ease anxiety, stress and depression. I feel the salt lamps also help with sleep and overall wellbeing.

Shake it Off

Although it is a crazy time of year, exercise is still something I aim to do every day. I find it incredible, not only for keeping me grounded, but also just for feeling good and uplifted.

However, I also know how busy everyone is at this time of year, and the thought of doing exercise every day can itself cause stress. Something that we want to avoid. So, this is where shaking comes in.

Shaking the body is something I have found to help rid the body of sluggish feelings or those blah moods. The saying, ‘shake it off’ clearly has merit in more ways than one.

Here’s What to Do:

Start by giving each leg a good shake, shake your bottom and your torso, shake your arms and hands, blubber through your lips and wobble your cheeks, run your hands through your hair and give the scalp a good shake (I do not recommend shaking the head as tension is often held in the neck).

Shaking works even better if you can do it with some uplifting funky music playing in the background. The music we love can do incredible things for us Empaths when experiencing energy overload.

The shaking method also works great if you pick up on any anger energy, It clears it from your energy field.

My diet also plays a massive part in my overall wellbeing. But, as I realise Christmas is not the time for that subject, especially with all that delicious festive food around 😉😊😊, I shall save that subject for another time.

Ok, that’s it for me today.

Hope you have found something to help you get through the silly season.

May I take this opportunity to wish you all a very Merry Christmas and an Incredible New Year.

Until next time.

Diane

 

 

Here are some more posts that might help with Xmas stress.

If you need to relax this post will help:  Incredible Relaxation Technique for the Empath

If you pick up on other people’s stress energy and emotions cast your eyes over this: Protection for the Empath

And if you spend time around overly negative people you need to read this: Reasons to Avoid Negative People

 

 

6 SIGNS AN EMPATH HAS A NEGATIVITY ADDICTION

Did you even think it was possible to become addicted to negativity?

I mean, it sounds utterly bonkers, doesn’t it?

When we think of addictions, we often just think about the ones related to drugs or alcohol, perhaps even to gambling. But to negativity?

So, how does it work? Continue reading

SET YOURSELF FREE FROM EMPATH INSECURITIES

Although it often doesn’t feel like it, we are currently living in some incredible times.

Times where we can move into our own authority and start living the empowered existence that we were meant to live.

However, as nice as it is to think we can sit back and watch as our lives become magically transformed, in these times of change, we still have to put in some work, if we want to see positive changes that last.

And yes, we always have obstacles to overcome in the process.

One of those being facing the insecurities that have been triggered by our Empath traits. Continue reading

Empaths: Stop Absorbing Other People’s Emotions

One thing we all know, as Empaths, is that we feel other people’s emotions.

Which isn’t always a bad thing, when they aren’t affecting us in a negative way.

However, the problem arises when we start absorbing the emotions, belonging to others, and taking them on as our own.

 

Regularly absorbing other peoples’ emotions can affect our health and happiness in so many different ways. Often leading to issues such as emotional toxicity.

When we absorb other people’s emotions it can affect not only the way we feel, but also the way we think. It impacts our adrenals, which are the stress glands. This then has a knock-on effect on the other endocrine glands, which are the glands that produce our hormones. This in turn can lead to hormone imbalances.

Everything in the body is connected, and so are our endocrine glands. When one hormone goes out of balance, it can affect another gland and the hormones it produces. So, what starts off as absorbing another’s emotions, and thus taking on their stress, can eventually lead to thyroid issues, chronic fatigue, food intolerances, and so much more.

I often describe the aftereffect of Empaths absorbing negative emotions as like having an allergy or food intolerance. Just like an allergen might give you a physical reaction, when you come into contact with it, you can get a physical reaction from the emotions you absorb. Continue reading

4 Reasons Why Empaths Get Sick When Around Certain People

Have you ever come away from spending time with certain people and felt physically ill?

Did you ever feel like you had a hangover after an evening out with friends, but weren’t actually drinking alcohol?

Or have you had a brief conversation with someone, only to feel pains or physical symptoms in certain body parts?

Have you ever wondered why this might happen?

There are a number of reasons that could be causing these reactions, but here we will look at the most common causes for Empaths to get sick after being in the presence of certain individuals.

1.You Are Intuitively Picking Up on Their Illness

Did you ever seen the famous psychics on TV who describe how someone passed, by explaining how it feels to them? They may experience a pain or pressure in a certain area within their body, which might, for example, tell them what body part of the deceased was impacted by an illness.

This is similar to what an Empath might experience, when they intuitively pick up an illness or imbalance within another.

Just like their ability to feel another person’s emotions, some Empaths can also pick up on physical imbalances, which might make them feel sick or weak in certain body parts. They may not know what it is they are sensing, just that they don’t feel great.

The sensation normally lasts for the duration of time spent in said person’s presence, up to a few hours after.

The good news is once the Empath understands what they are enduring, the easier it is for them to ‘switch off’ the sensation in the future.

2.You are Mixing with the Wrong People

If someone you are interacting with is highly negative, if they have bad intentions, or if their vibration is running at a much slower pace than yours, you can have a physical reaction within your body.

Anything from fatigue to feeling fluey could be experienced.

You will have a worse physical experience if said person also makes you stressed.

Stress contributes to and worsens any health problems. Stress-related illness can lead to autoimmune conditions. These conditions, that often go undiagnosed, cause many complications for the unaware Empath. Which might lead them to becoming physically sick when with certain people.

If someone is no good for you, especially if they activate your adrenals, which release stress hormones, your body will tell you by giving you a physical reaction.

In these cases, staying grounded and protected is your best option for prevention. However, with some people, avoidance may be the best option.

3. Your Immune System Has Been Compromised

When you have a compromised immune system, or an autoimmune condition, it is very common for you to have illnesses and physical reactions to chemicals, certain foods, and drinks. But that’s not all, you can also react to people’s energy in a physical way that makes you feel ill. This works like a ‘people allergy.’

The problem is, many Empaths don’t realise that a compromised immune system is making them sick after being around certain people. But if you are sensitive to energy, in any way, you can react in mysterious ways to people’s emotional energy.

Everything is energy vibrating at different frequencies, whether that be food, chemicals, emotions, or people.

If what the Empath is experiencing, after being around certain people, is immune-system related, the physical sensations, or not feeling well, can last for 12 to 48 hours after exposure. This post has 6 ways in which to quickly reduce these reactions.

4. You Have a Permeable Aura

Most Empaths come to realize they have a leaky aura when they experience near-constant exhaustion, and physical symptoms, after spending time around people. These people don’t have to be negative, angry or ill for this to happen. (This is also interrelated with number 3 on the list.)

Anyone whose auric field is permeable will experience discomfort when spending time around others. A healthy aura protects you from ‘ingesting’ the energy of others or any external influences.

Think of a shoe, when there’s a hole in the sole it allows in water, stones and other fragments that could damage the foot. Repair the sole and the foot remains dry and comfortable. This is like the aura. When it is leaky or permeable it lets in energy that doesn’t belong. Repair the damage and you become better protected.

One of the biggest indications of having leaky aura is if you remember a time when you weren’t so badly affected by being in the presence of others. If you want to learn more read this.

♦♦

Many Empaths have an inkling of what they should or shouldn’t do to stay happy and healthy, because their inner Knowing is constantly guiding them. Those nagging feelings, that something is not a fit, is your intuition at work trying to get your attention.

If you get physically ill after spending time around certain individuals, and you are not intuitively picking up on their pain or a bodily illness, take it as a warning sign. Either the other person is not good for you, or you have imbalances of the physical or energy bodies that need addressing.

Hope this helps on your journey.

Until next time.

Diane

©Diane Kathrine

 

 

As an Empath, if It’s Not True for Me Does That Mean It’s Not True for You?

It is an interesting question, isn’t it? If It’s Not True for Me Does That Mean It’s Not True for You?

If I experience something as an Empath, but you don’t, does that mean that you’re not an Empath?

If you have strong intuition, but I don’t, does that mean I’m a weak Empath?

If I can see your aura, but you can’t see mine, does that make me a more powerful Empath?

If you know the meaning of the emotions you feel in another, but another Empath doesn’t, does that mean they are unskilled or inauthentic?

Or what if I get incredibly fatigued when around a certain person, but another Empath doesn’t, does that mean I’m just bored of paying attention to that person, and the other Empath has got a greater attention span? Or is it they’re vibrational frequency or negativity is ‘sucking out my sunshine?’

I have said it before and I will say it again, as Empaths we are all diverse. Just like everyone else, we have different personalities, we have had different upbringings, we have different DNA, we have differing physical ailments, we have different beliefs and different abilities.

What works for one Empath won’t necessarily work for another.

Some Empaths are introvert. Some Empaths are extrovert. Some Empaths will be highly vocal in their beliefs, others will keep their opinions to themselves (often from learning that when someone is not ready for the information, they cannot hear).

However, we are so pushed into herd thinking, that it becomes difficult for us to accept that, even as Empaths, someone can have different abilities, outlooks or issues to deal with.

I have even seen written, within the Empath community, that an Empath having to ground or protect, from the emotional energy of others, is a ridiculous idea. The writer stated we simply need to learn to navigate the various energetic frequencies instead of ‘protecting’ from them.

Which could be classed as a very valid concept. Learning to navigate the energetic frequencies that surround people and our environment is an excellent idea. But it really isn’t that cut and dry.

Just because one Empath doesn’t need to take measures of protection/grounding, before spending time in public, or within certain energetic frequencies, does not mean that another won’t need to. Their energy sensitivity may be higher.

Humans Are All Different

There are some who need to take extra vitamin C and zinc, in the winter months, to protect from winter viruses. Others take no supplements and are fine. Some people need to use extra high factors of sun cream, to protect from sunburn, others don’t. One person may need to use earplugs to protect from sound frequencies, or music, another might not. And yes, some Empaths need to take protective measures, before going in public places, and some don’t. It really is that simple!

I have said before on this blog that the more I learn about life, the less I know. But something I do know, is that the human experience is supposed to be unique for each of us, as is the Empath experience.

It is just society that tries to convince us that we should all be the same box-tickers, living like robots, with no acceptance for anyone who has opposite beliefs or indeed ‘unusual abilities.’

Lack of Acceptance

Now, although this post may sound like I’m having a good old rant, I really wanted to point out the importance of acceptance, and how it can really change our outlook on life.

We see it all around us. People expect others to accept them, for their beliefs, feelings or ways of living, but they refuse to accept anyone who chooses not to adopt their views…

It is human nature to want to be accepted, but if someone is not willing to understand or accept that others experience life from a different perspective than themselves, how can it happen?

Acceptance is Bad for Business

Why do you think we are encouraged to attack each other constantly, instead of accepting each other?

We cannot stop hate with hate, we cannot stop racism with racism, we cannot stop discrimination with discrimination, and we cannot stop unacceptance with unacceptance. But that is so often the narrative pushed.

One thing is for sure, if the world can simply learn to accept others, and all their differences, then there would be no reason to fight. But I doubt that would ever be encouraged by the ‘mainstream’, because, let’s face it, acceptance of self and each other is bad for business.

Make The Changes You Can, Accept What You Can’t

When I advocate for acceptance of others, I am not saying we get to live happily ever after with someone we have no right to be with, or that we should put up with bad behaviour. But if we accept the fact that we are all supposed to be unique, it goes a long way towards a happier life.

I am also not trying to encourage anyone not to make changes in life or just to accept their lot. More that we should ‘change what we can change, and accept what we can’t’.

When we truly accept that we are all meant to be different, in our appearance, health, thoughts, beliefs and abilities, it is incredibly liberating.

Even by accepting that some people can be completely disagreeable and we will never get along with them, it frees up so much of our time wasted in frustration by them or their ways.

If It’s Not True for Me does That Mean It’s Not True for You?

So, going back to the title of this post: As Empaths, if It’s Not True for Me Does That Mean It’s Not True for You?

We can say that my life and your life or my truth and your truth may be poles apart, but if we can come to accept that, then the world will be a much brighter place to live.

Until next time,

Diane

©Diane Kathrine

 

EMPATHS IT’S TIME TO USE THIS INCREDIBLE POWER

In many of my posts, I write about techniques that Empaths can used to protect themselves from the rigours of Empath life (here, here, here and here).

What I probably haven’t mentioned, in many of these posts, is that several of these protection techniques also act as powerful forms of distraction that work in so many empowering ways.

Distracting the mind from pain, whether physical, spiritual or mental, is an incredible tool which we often forget about using to our advantage…

Examples

There are many occasions when we use techniques to distract the mind without necessarily realising.  When experiencing hunger pain, for example, if all you think about is food, you’ll remain hungry. If you engage your mind, with work or some tasks, your hunger quickly vanishes.

Another example can be seen in yoga: Whilst moving through the poses we might focus on ujjayi breath and holding bandhas (physical and energetic locks). By doing this, not only does it help direct prana, but the mind is focused and taken off the physical challenge of the pose. This also has the effect of taking the attention away from the stresses of everyday life. Which in turn contributes to a calm yet uplifted mindset after practise.

There are many other examples I could discuss, but, instead, let’s get straight to the easy distraction techniques you can use in your everyday life to stay empowered and on top:

1. Stay in Your Passions:

Doing what you love is so empowering during these challenging times. Not only does engaging in your passions work as a powerful distraction, but doing things that lighten your soul, and bring a sense of peace and joy to your life, will lift you up like nothing else.

If you don’t feel like you have anything to fit that bill, it is the perfect time to start experimenting with hobbies and pastimes, or just get creative.

In a world of rules, routine and restrictions, people seldom get time to be creative. But spending time creatively is one of the easiest ways to revel in the feel-good-factor. When you feel good you also feel grounded and centred. When creating from your passions, or interests, it has an uplifting effect and keeps the mind away from dark thoughts and feelings. A must for all Empaths.

2. Listen to Uplifting Music and Sing!:

Listening to the songs that move you in all the right ways can instil such a sense of joy and euphoria. If you know the words, sing along. It is incredible how much you can be uplifted by the music you love. It envelops your body and mind in the most powerful vibrations and distracts the attention in all the right ways. Singing along can itself be meditative. (Researcher, Gunter Kreutz, also discovered singing increases cortisol and other chemicals involved in healing.)

Music can go both ways. My advice would be to avoid music that encourages melancholy or brings back difficult memories, even if you enjoy the song.

UNCOVER THE SECRETS OF AN EMPATH

3. Use Your Pen and Paper

This may sound strange. How can pen and paper help distract the mind? Well, when you write things down, for example with what you want to do going forward in life, you connect with your right brain which helps keep you in creative mode. There is something about handwriting, as opposed to tapping words out on a computer, that helps activate our creative mind. When the creative mind is activated, as opposed to the logical left mind, you also receive more revelations in regards to what is currently happening in your life, or in our world, and can help you see the ‘bigger picture’.

In regards of to what to write about, either let your heart-mind guide you to what is right for you, or make notes on how you would like your future to be.

4. Get Near Trees:

This might sound like the hippiest statement ever, but spend as much time around trees as you can. Gaze upon them. Even go as far as hugging a tree. This not only has the effect of distracting the mind from the darkness in the world, but it takes you into a place of calm and healing. Let’s face it, we wouldn’t be alive if we didn’t have trees and greenery. There is so much wisdom and healing energy around trees (this post explains more), and that is exactly what many of us need right now to clear, rebalance and reset from the demands of Empath life.

5. Stop Doing Things That Bore You:

This isn’t so much a form of distraction. More a form of empowerment.  Feeling bored or unengaged by things that you used to enjoy, or were once an interest, is going to bring you down fast. If you are finding hobbies, lifestyles, or even people, you used to love, have stopped being pleasurable, maybe it’s time you stopped engaging in them, or at least have a break and see if you miss them. Perhaps try a new hobby instead.

6. Exercise:

Engaging in physical activity is a brilliant way to distract the mind from overwhelm or uncomfortable feelings. It’s also a fantastic way to keep the body and mind healthy. Depending on how you feel should depend on what is the best form of exercise to create balance within the body and mind.

If you are feeling lethargic and tired, some type of HIIT training (High intensity interval exercise) is super beneficial. It is also the best exercise for releasing human growth hormone.  HGH is a hormone that naturally elevates our moods, raises physical energy and keeps the mind in a more positive space. I have attached a link here to a 20-minute HIIT video on YouTube that can be done by most fitness levels (it is even beneficial to do if you suffer chronic fatigue). Just be sure to start slow, at your own level and don’t force your body into anything it’s not ready for.

If you are the opposite of being lethargic, and feel wired or hyper, then breath-and-bandha-focused yoga will help bring you back to a state of equilibrium, whilst also working as a distraction for the mind.

The reason I recommend breath-and-bandha-focused yoga is because, speaking from experience, it can be easy for the mind to wander and remain unfocused in yoga practice. When practising using the breath and bandhas simultaneously, however, it takes your yoga practice to another level. Here’s a couple of links to videos, of how to engage yogic breath and bandhas, on YouTube:

Breath and Bandhas

Yoga Breathing

Walking, whilst engaging your focus on your scenery/surroundings, is also fantastic for both high and low energy levels. Out near trees, even better!

The Biggest Obstacles

One of the biggest hurdles we face, when empowering the body and mind, is that when we are stressed or feel out of sorts, by the happenings in the world or indeed just Empath life, we often don’t feel like doing anything. We get so wrapped up in what we feel that we don’t think about anything else. But, when in a state of unease, this is the perfect time to use the power of distraction to engage the mind.

If you want to use clever distractions to your advantage, my advice would be to engage in them the moment you feel your mind wandering into ‘darker territory’ or, even better, find something you can do daily that keeps you in a state of empowerment…

Hope this helps you on your journey.

Until next time.

Diane

©Diane Kathrine

The Problem with Fake Positivity and Supressing Our Truth

A few weeks ago, I received a very good comment from a fellow Empath, regarding my urging of readers to try to remain in a positive space. The reader rightly pointed out that when we supress our feelings, by ‘pretending’ to be positive, it could cause more harm than good.

I am very grateful for the comment, because it not only got me pondering the importance of not supressing true feelings of pain or frustration, but it also made me realise that I may not have fully explained the reason why I encourage Empaths to stay in a positive mental space within my posts.

The reason I put emphasis on staying in a positive mindset is because I know how much damage both fear and anger causes the physical and energetic bodies.

I also know that, as Sensitives, if we allow our minds to be regularly engaged within pained emotions, we can get stuck in a very dark place, emotionally.

However, ‘acting’ positive, when we have a very valid reason for feeling upset or angry, could be classed as suppressing our truth, which ultimately keeps pain and grief trapped inside.

This is something I do not recommend. I wrote about this subject in my article: ‘What is Really Making You Angry?’.

Unfortunately, in recent times, many of the emotions we are experiencing have been activated by such things as shifting energy, EMF and solar activity, political dramas, as well as ‘dark sources’ that are purposely keeping our minds engaged in turmoil.

Sadly, it is much easier for humans to go into a space of fear or anger than it is for us to stay in an optimistic mental space.

As I’ve discussed before many times, the mainstream media has been playing on our fear in order to distract and divide the population. Keeping us not only in a weakened state, but also making us easily controllable.

So, when I write about being positive, it is more about staying in alignment with our ‘true self’ and keeping the mind from getting wrapped up in the propaganda being intentionally stirred up by ‘the powers that be.’

The Damage Caused by Supressed Feelings

But getting back to suppressing our true feelings:

As a species, we have often found it necessary to supress ourselves and our truth. Especially when it comes to grief or true emotional pain.

This type of suppression is incredibly destructive.

I know only too well the damage caused by burying emotional pain.

When I was 16 my dad died suddenly of a heart attack. At the time, I did not know how to deal with the anguish, so I buried it. Put on a fake smile and ignored the grief. Nearly a year to the day after my dad passed away, I started having panic attacks. Which were awful. I didn’t know it at the time, as they were happening, but it was because I had suppressed my grief. This containment had impacted my nervous system and eventually showed up as panic attacks.

Western Society doesn’t have a place for the grieving.

Grief makes people uncomfortable. We don’t know how to handle it.

After experiencing a loss of a loved one, most are ‘given’ a week or two to mourn. Then we are expected to come back to ‘normal.’

But the thing is, for most people, the mourning process takes a lot longer.

In many cases, the grieving period lasts a year or more (depending on circumstances). If we do not allow for this, and suppress our sorrow, it comes back to haunt us. In my case it was as panic attacks.

Having experienced the effect of burying grief, I would never encourage anyone to deny genuine feelings of pain and this includes anger.

However, nor would I recommend that we spend too much time festering on negative emotions, such as rage or hate, especially when we don’t know the trigger or origin, or when these emotions have been artificially stimulated, to keep the mind controlled.

Do not take ownership of that which has been intentionally stirred up to trap your mind.

Anther Explanation for Shifting Moods

Sometimes, however, we need to be given reasons for the erratic emotions we may experience, that are triggered by powerful external sources.

And what I mean by this is, certain phenomena of the natural world can massively Impact the human mind and body, especially of Empaths. Altering our moods, thinking process, and more.

At a ‘higher level,’ we are given ‘stories’ to explain these experiences. Or in other words, we are given circumstances or reasons that will explain excessive feelings of anger, frustration, etc. aroused by energetic shifts.

Keeping it Real

As I mentioned in a past post (The Purpose of your Frustration), much of the pain we have experienced, over the years, has served a purpose. The reasons for which have been revealed, for many, in recent times.

But staying out of manufactured propaganda is so important now, as is bringing your mind back to its true positive state.

This time is not about being ‘fake positive.’ It’s about being at one with self, and finding your rightful optimism and joy within.

Because, believe me, it is there. We just have to stay tuned into its frequency.

Hope all is keeping well in your world.

Until next time.

Diane

©Diane Kathrine

 

Are you a Narcissist Target?

One thing all Empaths will have endured at some point on their journey is a person who behaves in a narcissistic way. For some, however, it is part of their everyday life.

When I use the term narcissist target, in the headline, I am referring to anyone who has been on the receiving end of a narcissist’s attention. This can be via their initial charm through to their lies and manipulation.

But the question has to be, why do Empaths so often end up in the firing line?

One explanation is because of the ‘light’ an Empath carries inside. It’s a light that might be considered, by certain individuals, as a weakness or something that can be controlled. Yet that isn’t the only reason. Before we come to that, we will take a quick peek at the traits of a narcissist.

Traits of a Narcissist

Some of the better-known traits are: high self-esteem, a distinct lack of empathy, excessive self-admiration and a tendency towards selfish or resentful behaviours. But there’s more…

One-sidedness, a manipulative nature, unrealistic expectations of others, an excess need for control, and a huge sympathy deficiency can also fall under the same umbrella. It is these traits that often cause problems for the Empaths.

Why Empaths Attract Narcissists

Over the years, I have discussed the subject of why narcissists attract Empaths and vice versa in other posts and books (here, here, and here). It is my belief that although at opposite ends of the spectrum, both Empaths and narcissists are sensitive people and highly reactive.

Like attracts like. Sensitive attracts sensitive. Yet, one of the biggest reasons why Empaths are so often targeted and end up in the firing line of those with a narcissistic personality is because of their keen observational skills.

The Reflecting Empath

An Empath doesn’t just listen to a person’s dialogue, they observe tone and usage of words, they notice body movements, facial expressions, and they see things that others try to mask. This causes an issue for those who do not want to be ‘seen.’ Particularly when they are hiding something.

A narcissist never wants to be wrong, never wants to be seen as the ‘bad guy’ and wants others to think highly of them. But an Empath often acts like a mirror. Even if they don’t point out the narcissist’s concealed traits verbally, they will be reflected back. (This is discussed more in the Mirror of the Empath.) An Empath reflects truth. They will see it hidden behind any façade, no matter how tightly knitted.

If the finely polished veneer of a narcissist is threatened in any way, especially with exposure, they will attack. They often concoct outlandish stories to discredit an Empath, or anyone who reveals their truth, and blame them for the actions that they carried out themselves. They target those considered a threat.

Generally, a narcissist will not face the truth of who they are, if it makes them appear wrong or in any way a bad person. They convince themselves that it is everyone else who is at fault.

Being Repelled

Even if you have a strong repulsion towards narcissists, and avoid them like the plague, you can still be on the receiving end of their wrath, or end up as a target. Narcissists like to be praised and feel special. They want respect and if they are not shown it, they tend to lash out. If you have bruised a narcissist’s ego, by not giving them the respect they think is deserved, then expect to face a backlash.

The Good News

The good news is that narcissists can work as a catalyst on an Empath’s journey. Although it will not feel like it at the time, but anything that ignites insecurities, emotional injuries, victim mentality or personal challenges, can also push an Empath towards transformation. The darkness reveals the inner light. It encourages us to work on ourselves, which in turn takes us to a higher vantage point.

It is often the case that the more challenges an Empath faces the wiser they become and the greater their understanding of life.

I am certainly not suggesting that constant suffering is the perfect formula for enlightenment, but we come to a point when we understand why we have endured such difficulties. We can then see how they shaped us into becoming better people.

Avoiding Excessive Emotional Reactions

Life really is an obstacle course. It gives rise to many uncomfortable and painful experiences. However, if we have an emotional reaction to everything a narcissist, or anyone else, says or does then we put ourselves on a fast-tracked path to self-destruction.

We have to train ourself out of excessive emotional reactions, avoid wallowing in our own misery and not be tempted into revenge. Not that revenge is ever on an Empath’s radar, but it is very easy to think, ‘I’ll show them.’ Or to have the belief that if I say or do nothing, they are getting away with it. This will just lead to more lies and more attacks. We must not forget there is a greater force than ourselves at work that creates balance… Karma.

KARMA

Having been observing the world for many years, I have seen the law of attraction and karma work over and over. People may seem to get away with treating others atrociously, then, suddenly, karma catches up.

Everything goes around. Karma keeps each of us responsible for our behaviour.

Dealing with the Problem

So, finally, the question is, what can we do about being a narcissist target? Well, one thing is for sure, we will not change the mind of a narcissist, or those who have an over-inflated ego, if it makes them to appear wrong. If they have decided it is us who is at fault, it is unlikely we will get them to admit otherwise. We can only change ourself and our reactions. Take back our power.

The best way to react is with no reaction and don’t be drawn into conflicts designed to pull you down or make you feel bad. Now, when I say react with no reaction, I am not saying lie down and let someone trample all over you. Simply walk away. Avoid feeding your fear or pain by getting upset at the lies they may spread.

When you continuously focus on something or someone your attention feeds the energy. Remember: where your focus goes your energy flows.

Life really is too short to waste your precious time on those who steal your joy and drain your energy.

When you walk away or show no interest in their lies, they move on. The more lives they touch, with manipulative ways, the sooner their truth is revealed.

By avoiding excessive emotional reactions, it also helps keep one’s vibration raised. Yes, I know, easier said than done. But by getting in control of the mind and working to stay grounded, it helps us better control our emotional reactions. (This is where mind-stilling though breathing techniques, meditation and yoga can come in handy.)

Stay in gratitude and it will keep you in a ‘higher space.’ Keep pushing forward! Stay in your light and don’t let anyone extinguish it!

Next time we delve a little deeper into the increase in Empath emotional reactions.

Until next time.

Diane.

©Diane Kathrine

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Prevent Panic Attacks and Anxiety: A Guide for Empaths & HSPs

If you have ever experienced a panic attack you will know only too well that they are not something you would wish on anyone. They create the kind of dread and sense of impending doom that are beyond comprehension.

Because Empaths and HSPs feel everything so intensely, it is often the case that they are more prone to experiencing anxiety and panic attacks.

Not Feeling Safe

Going through life over-feeling emotions and the emotional energy of others can create the perception of being unsafe, especially when out in public or around certain people. Feeling unsafe can put the body into fight-or-flight mode which is a response of the sympathetic nervous system. When the body is in fight-or-flight it is in a constant state of stress.

We often experience a sense of not feeling safe when we have experienced past traumas, especially bereavement or physical or emotional abuse, and not dealt with them.

Another issue many Empaths and HSPs face, which can affect our perception of safety, is feeling misunderstood. When we feel misunderstood it often creates an inability to truly connect with others. Which often leads to a sense of isolation, and is a catalyst for repetitive dark thoughts.

Research has shown that negative thought patterns can be inflammatory. They create problems within the body and mind and keep us in trauma mode.

We all have good and bad within us, light and dark. When we are suffering or in pain, as in with anxiety or panic attacks, it is often because we have inadvertently been feeding the darkness. We allow our pain to dictate our lives. That said, we don’t necessarily have to have been suffering to experience panic attacks. Sometimes external factors, certain foods or hormonal changes can be the trigger.

Being aware of triggers, as well as having knowledge of what we can do if we start to suffer with anxiety or panic attacks, can ensure we don’t needlessly suffer. The following are some simple steps to help prevent anxiety…

1. Use meditation and breathing exercises:

Breathing and meditation practices help cultivate more positive thoughts, help balance the stress hormones and instil calm. However, some people find meditation too stressful to perform when experiencing panic attacks or anxiety. The stillness can become unnerving. In these cases, moving meditations, such as yoga with the breath, or deep breathing is massively beneficial.

The Whisky Breath is a quick breathing exercise which can offer instant relief. Simply inhale for a count of four and then exhale for a count of eight. Continue for as long as you need. This exercise switches on the parasympathetic nervous system, which helps to prevent or stop panic attacks.  The three-minute meditation performed daily, after doing the Whisky Breath breathing, will help keep the mind positive and anxiety at bay.

There’s more information on breathing exercises and yoga here and here.

2. Keep away from people who make you feel unsafe:

If you don’t feel safe, or have trust issues with certain friends or family members, or if you don’t feel they have your best interest at heart it can cause emotional trauma. It is wise to avoid those who create safety issues for the health of your body and mind, which in turn can prevent anxiety.

3. Check your diet:

Are you eating chemical-laden foods, or foods that are known to trigger autoimmune conditions? Anxiety can sometimes be a warning from your body, telling you to pay attention. If you suspect your diet is activating anxiety or panic attacks, keeping a food diary can help you pinpoint the triggers. Read more on this post.

4. Supplement wisely:

Even with the healthiest of diets it is difficult to know we are getting, or absorbing, a full range of nutrients. We often eat anti-nutrient foods without realising (foods that block or hinder nutrient absorption), which means the good stuff we do take in doesn’t get chance to do its job. Vitamin and mineral deficiency can be a big trigger for anxiety. A basic supplementation regime can help in regards to anxiety and panic attacks. This post gives more info.

5. Take Valerian Root:

Valerian root is a natural herb used for treating anxiety and insomnia. Similar to melatonin, valerian root puts you in relaxed sleepy state. Valerian contains a neurotransmitter called GABA, that is known to have a powerfully calming effect on the mind.

6. Do therapeutic exercise:

Yoga and walking are probably two of the most therapeutic forms of exercise. There is a type of yoga to suit everyone, but it has to be practised regularly to see results. Walking is easy and super beneficial for the body and mind. Also, high intensity exercise, which helps release human growth hormone, can be beneficial for stopping panic attacks.

7. Use crystals:

There are many different types of crystals that can help with anxiety. Rose Quartz in particular is a lovely stone to help with panic attacks. It is a love stone that really helps calm the emotions. When choosing crystals for anxiety it is best to see them in person (instead of ordering online). If gazing on a certain stone makes you feel calm inside it is generally a good choice.

8. Salt therapy:

Taking salt baths can be incredibly calming and soothing for the body and mind. Even better, if you live near an ocean taking a daily dip can work wonders for soothing anxiety. This post gives more details.

9. Check your water levels:

If you are dehydrated, even just a little, it can trigger anxiety and panic attacks. This post gives more information.

10. Reduce wireless air time:

More research is coming to light showing how WIFI is a major cause of anxiety and panic attacks, especially when spending a lot of time wirelessly downloading on the internet (Youtube, etc.). Give yourself a few days away from WIFI and see what effect it has. Switch your phone to aeroplane mode when not in use and limit your time on the internet. This post explains more.

11. Keep your bedroom as a calm zone:

Quality sleep is important for preventing anxiety and panic attacks. Don’t keep electrical gadgets, especially WIFI gadgets, in the bedroom. Keep your bedroom well aired and clean. Use black out curtains to ensure a solid night’s sleep.

12. Use essential oils:

Essential oils are perfect for instilling calm. Lavender being one of the best allrounders, but other good ones are Basil, Chamomile or Geranium. You can normally feel the calming effects of these essential oils within ten minutes of application. Simply massage a few drops, mixed with a teaspoon of oil, into the soles of your feet. Or use them in your bath, add them to your body oils or put a few drops on your pillow before sleep time. Check this post out for more essential oils and their benefits.

13. Avoid caffeine:

Caffeine is one of the worst things for triggering panic attacks and anxiety. It is found in coffee, tea, chocolate and colas. Avoidance will go a long way to keeping anxiety and panic attacks at bay.

14. Avoid stimulants:

Alcohol and recreational drugs can be another big trigger of anxiety. Many people assume alcohol is a relaxant, but it is when the effects wear off that the problems start.

15. Avoid chemicals:

If you are Sensitive, it often means you will be sensitive to chemicals in products and scents, which can trigger many unusual physical reactions and stress within the body. Keep your products as natural as possible, including laundry detergent, household cleaning products and personal hygiene products.

16. Listen to soothing sounds:

There are some incredibly soothing sounds that can help reduce anxiety and prevent panic attacks. Ocean sounds, angelic harmonies, thunderstorms, gentle chimes, etc. are incredibly calming to the body and mind. Try to avoid live music downloads (such as on Youtube) as the WIFI can trigger more anxiety. Perhaps buy a CD and listen through headphones.

17. Don’t eat late at night:

Eating late at night can be the trigger for sleep anxiety and panic attacks. Try to have your last meal at least three hours before bedtime to ensure it is digested.

18. Get out in Nature:

This is a perfect remedy for anxiety and panic disorder. Even listening to the birds singing is beneficial. Read more here on the benefits of nature for an Empath.

19. Massage and reflexology:

Massaging body treatments work wonders for helping with anxiety, especially reflexology, which works on the reflex points on your feet. Schedule in time for yourself and book in a weekly treatment to help soothe your body and mind.

20. Talk to a specialist:

If you know you have supressed past trauma such as a bereavement, emotional or physical abuse, or unresolved issues, it might help to talk to a trained therapist. Supressed trauma is often reignited in times of stress, which often triggers panic attacks.

21. Have your hormones checked:

This is a big one, especially for women. If you are going through any kind of hormonal transition, such as perimenopause or menopause, it can be a big trigger for panic attacks. Perimenopause often starts from the late thirties onwards and can create many unusual and uncomfortable physical and mental symptoms.

So, there you go. Hopefully, you will have found something on the list that will help if you suffer with anxiety or panic attacks. But even if you don’t suffer with anxiety now, it is always good to have this page bookmarked for future reference. Anxiety can be triggered at any point in life, sometimes with no known cause. Having a reminder of what steps to take to combat panic attacks can avoid a lot of unnecessary suffering.

Until next time.

Diane

©Diane Kathrine

 

 

 

The Miracle Three-Minute Meditation for a Tired Empath Mind

It is said that the average person has about thirty-five thoughts a minute. Now, I can’t say whether that is true for everyone, I’m not even sure how thoughts are measured, but we certainly think more than we realise.

Consistent positive thoughts tend to bring about positivity in our world. However, it is when our thoughts become dark, menacing and repetitive that they make life more challenging. Which, sadly, for the majority, is often the case. Especially when experiencing difficulties or stress in life.

Research

Research has shown that negative thought patterns are inflammatory. Meaning, they are not only disruptive to our mental health but also to our physical. The body and mind are connected. What weakens one will weaken the other.

As most of you know, getting out of a repetitive thinking pattern is not easy to do, especially when thoughts have been triggered by stress, trauma or ‘people factors.’ But training our mind for stillness, through meditation, can be a passport to a healthier and happier life.

Get Back in Control

The problem is, in our busy lives, finding time for a meditation practice becomes a chore and can in itself cause feelings of stress. We’re often advised that the only way to see results, from meditating, is to spend fifteen to twenty minutes in deep meditation. Well, I’ve discovered that that does not have to be the case.

We can get incredible benefits from practicing meditation for just three minutes a day. Yes, just three minutes!

We can all find a spare three minutes. Whether that be when we are in the bath, when we are cooling down after exercise, whilst waiting for dinner to cook, or before we go to sleep at night. It is very doable. I find morning is the best time, as it sets me up for the day.

You may now be thinking there would be no way you could still the mind within a three-minute time frame. But it is entirely possible and I am about to reveal the simple steps that can allow for three minutes of thought-free bliss.

What You Need

You will need a loud ticking clock, or at least loud enough to hear, and a comfortable place to sit where you won’t be disturbed.

Technique

  • Close your eyes
  • Focus your mind on the clock ticking. One tick should be one second.
  • Now, start counting back from thirty. Allow your mind to go nowhere else except the ticking clock and your count.
  • When you reach one, fold over one of your fingers and go back to counting back from thirty. Continue for another five rounds. Folding over a finger after each round (your fingers are your counters).
  • If you find your mind attempting to wander, simply bring it back to the count and the tick of the clock.
  • After six rounds of counting back from thirty, your mini meditation is done.

How easy was that? Three minutes and done.

The practice becomes so enjoyable that you often find when the three minutes are up you want to stay that little bit longer within the stillness of your mind. (It is often in this stillness that we get incredible insights and intuitive downloads.) In fact, this three-minute meditation is the perfect starting point to building a longer practice. If that’s what you want.

(I will note that if your mind has been overly hectic with a rush of rampant thoughts, you may need to do the technique twice. First time to still your mind, the second round to enjoy the stillness.)

Make it Your Own

If you prefer to change the way you count, feel free. I find counting backwards for a round of thirty is a better way to stay in control of my mind. It is often when I do a longer count that my mind starts wandering. But, if you prefer, counting back from sixty or even one-hundred and eighty is fine too. Whatever works for you.

Why the Clock?

There’s something rhythmically therapeutic about listening to a ticking clock. I guess the flowing beat is hypnotic. It helps keep the mind distracted from thoughts. That’s not to say you won’t have thoughts when you first start practicing. Thoughts are powerful little blighters. They do not like to be told to shut up. But by using the count and the ticking clock, you very quickly realise when your mind is wandering, and can pull it back into line.

Watch this video to see the importance of meditating at this time.

Ok, that’s it for me for today. Look out for my next post which is a guide to preventing anxiety and panic attacks for an Empath.

Until next time…

Diane

©Diane Kathrine

 

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Sheltering from Loud Energy and Sensory Overload

To some loud energy may seem like a weird concept. But not to an Empath. An Empath will immediately know what is meant by loud energy and why we often need to find ways to shelter from it.

As Empaths, we become adept at differentiating levels of energy. We even become proficient at knowing what someone will feel like just by observing them from a distance. I often think we measure a person’s energy in a similar way that we measure sound. And just like sound can be interpreted as being loud, so can someone’s energy. (I’m sure you have experienced wanting to ‘shush’ someone even though they have not said a word.)

It is often the case that the livelier a person the louder their energy. However, someone can still have loud energy without necessarily being a loud person. There are several factors that seem to raise a person’s ‘vibrational volume’ and they are:

  • Being in quiet emotional pain (suffering in silence).
  • Grasping for attention or being super self-absorbed.
  • Being famous (although this energy can be quite enigmatic).
  • Containing anger or resentments.

Having loud energy is certainly no crime and we cannot build resentments towards someone just because of their ‘energetic decibels.’ But, just like persistent loud noises can impact our health and wellbeing, so can loud energy.

Sensory Overload

You may yourself have noticed that on some occasions you are not affected by the noisy energy of a person, but at other times it winds you up to the point of distraction. This often happens when there’s been a sensory overload. If all your senses have been on overload you won’t handle a person’s loud energy as well as you should.

We talk about being sensitive to other people’s energy, but that’s not all we can be sensitive to. Many Empaths have heightened senses. We hear sounds louder, see colours brighter and taste foods more intensely. We also suffer more with food sensitivities which also contributes to heightened senses.

It is often when all our senses are on overload that we cannot handle the loud energy of people. And is another reason why Empaths don’t do well spending a lot of time in places that are loud or filled with lots of people.

Sensory overload can trigger: fatigue, mood swings, people irritation, and more.

If we become irritated when around another person, we often blame it on their energy, but it might just be that it was ‘the straw that broke the camel’s back.’ In other words, all our other senses have become so heightened that we cannot take any more ‘input.’

The thing is when we are overloaded it causes unnecessary stress to the body and mind. We then get caught up in a vicious cycle of energy overload and our senses never get a rest.

Now, as nice as it would be to ask someone to contain their energy, this obviously isn’t an option. We need ways to filter and cleanse our senses so that we don’t get taken down by sensory overload.

I often talk about the importance of grounding for an Empath, which is not just great for ‘energy protection’ it also works as an easy way to rebalance or calm our senses.

Nature

Getting outdoors into the natural world is one of the top ways of grounding. Nature is so soothing to the body, mind and soul. Sadly, the green spaces in and around our cities are getting less and less. Houses, apartment blocks and business units are being built on every available piece of land. This has more impact on our general wellbeing than we probably realize. (Read more about Nature’s healing power here.)

My husband and I do a lot of travelling around the UK. Mostly down south on the M6. But we also go up to Scotland. When we drive towards London, we don’t pass much greenery and we often arrive at our destination lethargic and agitated. However, when driving up to Scotland the opposite is true. We often feel uplifted. If you have done any driving through the UK (or any other place where you go from city to greenery) you might have also experienced this yourself. The further North you travel, on the M6 in the UK, the greener it becomes. The landscape is beautiful and calming to gaze upon. It is soothing to the senses. And that is without even getting out of the car.

Although I know the volume of traffic plays a part in draining our energy when travelling (south-bound on the M6 is particularly busy), we have also sat in traffic heading towards Scotland and it by no means has the same effect.

So, yes, to protect from sensory overload, get out in Nature as much as possible. Keep plants and flowers in the house and garden. Even potted herbs dotted around the kitchen will help bring Nature indoors.

If you don’t get chance to get outdoors much, never fear, there are other fab ways to help soothe the senses and they are:

Meditative Breathing

Before and after going to busy places use meditative breathing exercises for a couple of minutes or longer. A good one to use is the 4/7/8 breathing technique. Inhale for 4 beats, hold for 7 beats, exhale for 8 beats. This practice is soothing to all senses and helps protect from loud energy.

Buzzing bee breath is another great technique to use. Simply close your eyes, plug in your ears with your fingers, inhale and, keeping the mouth closed, exhale whilst making the sound of a buzzing bee. (See more here.)

Crystals

Carrying or wearing grounding crystals, such as Hematite or Black Tourmaline, are perfect for protection. These stones not only help protect you from loud energy, they are also soothing to the emotions and help keep you grounded. (More on crystals coming soon.)

Aromatherapy

A great way to soothe your senses and bring all-round calm is by using aromatherapy oils. Before going to peopled places, put some lavender on a hanky and breathe it in when ‘overloaded.’ Or use essential oils in the bath after an energy overload. (Here’s a post to get you started.)

It is also a good idea to avoid overly potent chemical smells (car fumes, air fresheners, cleaning products, soaps, perfumes and deodorants, etc.), which can also overload the senses.

Music

The right type of music, or sounds, can work wonders for soothing your senses and protecting from loud energy. Take your ear phones and Ipod (do people still use these?) or other device and listen to soothing or uplifting music when in places where there is a lot of sensory stimuli.

Eye Cupping

Too much visual stimuli can be overloading. A simple way to soothe your sight sense is eye cupping. Rub your hands together to warm them up, then place your palms over your eyes. Open your eyes into the dark warmth of your palms for as longs as needed (only perform when safe to do so).

So, there you go. Hopefully you will have some new inspiration of what to try to prevent sensory overload and to protect from loud energy. (If you’re looking for more this post might help.)

In my next post I will be addressing a massive factor that is responsible for causing Empath overwhelm and sensory overload. Be sure to look out for it.

Hope you’re all keeping well in your little corners of the world.

Until next time.

Diane

©Diane Kathrine

 

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What is Really Making You Angry as an Empath?

Have you found yourself suffering more with angry emotional reactions lately than what is usual? Have you ever wondered why?

Following on from my last post about the shadow side, today I want to discuss another way in which the shadow may be experienced: through anger.

The reason this is an important issue to address is because anger is especially damaging to the body. Anger stresses the adrenals, causes stomach problems, and weakens the heart area. in fact, just one minute of anger can suppress the immune system for five hours.

In current times it seems anger is being purposely stimulated amongst the masses, which is not good for the Empaths.

All around the world we see people getting angry or hateful over ‘local or global affairs.’ There is so much fury being projected on to issues presented online that it makes you question: are people really so angry with these issues or is it something else? Something deeper that has been suppressed that is trying to draw their attention?

An Empath will always be affected by the anger in others; but they also have their own to deal with. However, because they know the damage anger can do, when projected on to others, it is often suppressed. Which rarely leads to anything good.

You’re Never Angry About What You Think You’re Angry About!

The above statement is so true. We are rarely infuriated by what we think. We are simply projecting our pain when triggered.

When we project our pain on to external factors, instead of looking inwards to find and fix what needs fixing, we don’t uncover the real roots of our anger.

How Do We Uncover What is Really Making Us Angry?

An unhealed Empath, who has spent years stuffing down emotions, can find offence in pretty much everything. In these times, however, everything is rising to the surface. As noted many times in other posts, imbalances in hormones, due to the diet and environmental factors, plays a huge part in emotional reactions (read more here), but they mostly have to do with our past.

Going Backwards to go Forwards

In life we often have to go backwards to go forwards. What I mean by this is we have to visit the origins of the wounds from our past before we can move away from them.

If, for example, anger is triggered in the present by someone expressing their beliefs, the question has to be asked: Why are their opinions striking a chord?

Could it be related to a buried memory from childhood? Maybe a memory of being told you were wrong? Or perhaps being told you were not good enough? Perhaps regularly? Or it could be that you just want to express yourself without someone jumping in to say that your opinions are unfounded, or liken your ideas to a conspiracy theory (yes, that has happened to me before).

Anger projected into the present is likely to have originated from a past issue, often made much worse by hormone imbalances (read more here ), but it will usually be disguised as anger towards something else.

The ego is often blamed for certain ‘toxic feelings.’ And yes, the ego likes to dominate, it likes to be right and is also easily bruised. But an inflated ego is not always the precursor to anger within an Empath, it is more likely to be the wounds of the shadow.

The shadow holds the unresolved issues, emotional pain and insecurities that affect our behaviour and outlook on life. It also likes to trigger anger. That said, sometimes experiencing dark emotions is not always a bad thing.

Can Positive Situations Come from Anger?

There are times when anger and rage can propel us to make changes in life, pushing us onwards and upwards. It can also help us address that which needs addressing. However, when it is anger outbursts or silent anger, that quietly lingers in the shadows without serving any purpose except stress, then it is a problem!

Do we really want to punish our self for someone else’s opinion or mistake? Because that’s what we do when we host or suppress the emotion of anger.

People will always disagree. It doesn’t mean one is right and the other is wrong. There is just a difference of opinion. We do not need to convince anyone of anything. If someone is not ready to hear our opinion it is not our job to force it upon them. In fact, some people will never hear what we have to say, no matter how much truth is in our words, and that’s ok.

So, how do we tackle the anger or uncomfortable feelings that arise?

Firstly, do not suppress anger. But also, don’t take it out on others.

Many years ago, I read Louise Hay’s recommendation of using a pillow to release anger. Simply take a nice fluffy pillow and, when no one is around, beat it up. It does help.

Secondly, get familiar with the triggers:

To find out where your anger stems from, question yourself. Who are you really angry with? When you ask this question, a picture of someone will quickly come to mind often alongside an uncomfortable memory or feeling.

Do you really want that person or persons to continue to hurt you today? If the answer is no, it’s time to stop or release the anger reaction. Breathe through it or just pause and allow it to pass.

As I said, anger is hugely detrimental to health, as is any of the other stressed/pained emotions.

I realize that switching off emotions is a lot harder than just turning off a light switch. There are several other factors we have to consider. For example, have we become addicted to the hormones these emotions produce (read this post to uncover if you have a negativity addiction)? or are we unable to let go of the pain because it has become part of our identity? But understanding the cause helps in reducing the reactions.

The long-term goal is to stop feeding the shadow when it ignites an anger response. But recognizing that it is the shadow at work is halfway to making this realization.

Healing

When healed, we come to understand that what others say, think or do is more a reflection of them and not us. But until we get to this place, using grounding techniques, such as those I discuss here, will help reduce anger or prevent other emotional reactions, and a nice fluffy pillow (for pounding out the emotions) is always there for those darker days.

These journeys, we are each experiencing, have been designed especially for us. The beliefs we have and the problems we face are ours to overcome. The same can be said for everyone out there. By allowing others to have their own opinion, by walking away from fights that will never be resolved, or from the people who take pleasure in putting others down, it is not only liberating but also healing. And addressing the truth behind anger goes a long way towards its release.

Hope this helps on your journey.

Until next time.

Diane.

©Diane Kathrine

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Why are Empaths Painted as The Villain?

Have you ever been accused of saying something you didn’t say, or blamed for something you didn’t do…?

For an Empath this is more common than you might think…

I am prone to having a roving mind. Having a good old ponder on life and its many ups and downs. During my musings, I often think about my Empath traits, traits that I have lived with for so long, and the impact they have. One thing is for sure, they certainly haven’t offered the easiest ride in life, especially when being the target for unfair attacks and blame.

I know many of you lovely Empaths out there will have experienced either being painted as the villain or being on the receiving end of a character assassination at some point on your journey, and this is what I want to address today.

I have discussed this subject in other posts over the years, but with all this crazy energy affecting the people of the world I thought it a good idea to address it again.

Any Empath who spends time around people often finds themselves under attack in weird ways and for nonsensical reasons. And it’s always good to have reminders as to why these attacks happen because, let’s face it, they don’t feel good.

It is human nature to want to be accepted by others. We are pack animals and don’t always want to be ostracized from the herd (unless we are done with people)..But being wrongly accused, or blamed for something we didn’t do, usually pushes us away from family or friends because it is difficult to deal with such betrayal.

It is common for an Empath to make the mistake of believing that those in our life think and feel the way we think and feel. Therefore, it is beyond our comprehension if someone attacks us or paints us as some ‘crooked creature’.

So why is it so many Empaths are disliked, perceived as the bad guy or are wrongly accused?

There are several reasons; one of the first being:

The Mirror Effect

Empaths can unintentionally reflect what they feel in another. Revealing their truths. Anything hidden, such as insecurities, suppressed shame, guilt or anger, builds the longer it is left buried. If someone conceals traits, such as the above, that they don’t like about themselves, they are reminded of them when in an Empath’s presence.

Why Does this Happen?

Due to the fact an Empath picks up on other people’s emotions, hidden behaviours and true personality traits, we often take them on, sometimes acting them out. Otherwise known as morphing. We basically become like a mirror. Reminding the other of what they are hiding from. This can cause an instant dislike from them to us.

If this has been your experience, that someone seems cold towards you for no reason, it could be that you are reflecting the truth they deny. Or there could be another reason…

You Have a Super-Speedy Vibration

An Empath is generally always working on themselves. Working to clear toxic emotions, dark thoughts or outdated behaviours. We want to make our world into a better brighter place, and we know by making changes to ourselves it will also benefit the outside world.

When we do the work and make any positive changes to our mind, body or spirit, we become cleaner and purer. This effectively speeds up our vibration. Which is a good thing; but it can make others uncomfortable.

Just like an Empath’s need not to be around people who spew negativity, there are some who cannot stand being around those who emit a sparkly clean energy.

Now, this is not to say an Empath is perfect or that they are some kind of ‘quiet saint’. We all have flaws and weaknesses we need to work through. The whole point of life is to evolve. But vibrating in a higher space can repel people, even those we love.

What Does This Look Like?

You may have noticed when in an emotionally low place some friends prefer you that way. It seems to make them comfortable that you are suffering (which is randomly odd). Yet when we make changes and get into a higher vibrating space, those same people don’t always like it. They may try to bring us back down, by attempting to extinguish our inner-light and happiness.

This isn’t always a cruelty thing. They sense us moving away from them and lash out in the hopes it will bring us back to their level.

People sense change, whether it is visually apparent or not, they feel when another has changed or stepped up their frequency. Not everyone is ready to raise their vibration. Some still have lessons to learn at their level and are not ready to move forwards. And because they are not ready, they may try to draw us back down. This is often done by snide remarks and unkind comments. But this is not the only thing that ignites a negative response from others…

An Empath’s Quiet Nature is often Deemed as Offensive

Yes, you did just read that line correctly. Another reason people form an instant dislike of some Empaths (especially the introverts) is because of a quiet nature. Here’s why:

To those of an insecure nature, an Empath’s sometimes quiet or distant ways may be taken as a snub or a form of disrespect. We may be considered as being remote or standoffish and this can be wrongly interpreted as superior or ‘judgy’ behaviour. In other words, some people assume we believe we are ‘above them’.

Normally, when an Empath acts in an aloof or distant way, it is because we are on overload, drained and in need of a ‘timeout’. When having taken on too much stimuli, we want to be invisible to others. A fatigue meltdown means an Empath can’t deal with someone offloading their troubles. We may switch off. Even polite conversation is too much. And this behaviour is often interpreted as a rejection.

Because most people don’t feel an inch of what an Empath does, it is difficult for them to understand our need to withdraw. Sadly, the more insecure someone is, the more they are offended. If we’re seen as blowing ‘hot and cold’, our behaviour may be considered as arrogance. If this causes insult, we may be rejected, or our character is attacked as a form of retaliation.

So, if someone develops an aversion towards you, for no good reason, if they attack you behind your back or paint you as the ‘bad guy’, remember it is not always because of something you have done, instead it is a flaw or insecurity in your attacker.

People will always be threatened by an Empath’s light. We need to know that that’s ok and keep focused on what inspires or uplifts us, instead of on those who are offended by our Empath ways.

Hope this helps on your journey.

Until next time.

Diane

©Diane Kathrine

 

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The Precipice of Change & Why It Gets Worse Before It Gets Better

In the past few years we have seen some crazy hate campaigns going on in the media. Usually disguised as crusades for acceptance, equality or important political issues, but the true intention of these campaigns is usually to keep people distracted and divided.

Before I go any further, I would like to say that this is not a post on politics, issues on equality or anything like that. I am discussing how damaging all the dark energy, that is being fired up, is having and the reason for it.

I am not into politics and would never aim to influence anyone’s opinion on these matters, but what is happening now is seriously ugly, and anyone who is Sensitive will be horribly affected by the division, aggression and hate purposely stimulated.

The above campaigns are normally disguised as ‘pushes towards positive progression’, but as always within the mainstream media there is usually a hidden agenda to keep people away from their truth and self-evolvement.

Everyone wants to be accepted, and we are being told that we should be more accepting of those who are different. Acceptance of others is a good thing and should definitely be encouraged. But by stirring up hate in order to achieve this will not work. Hatred will never encourage acceptance. Evil begets evil, anger begets anger and hate begets hate.

The reason I wanted to address this subject today is because the type of energy that is being stirred up is the kind that brings an Empath down fast, if they are unfortunate enough to get caught up in it, and distracted from their own evolvement.

It is very easy for an Empath to lift the energy of others, in the form of opinions and ideas, and take them on as their own. We don’t even have to be physically in the presence of another for this to happen, reading online articles or watching videos can have the same impact. We can become so swayed by overwhelming opinions and energy that we get distracted from our life and dragged into a ‘manufactured war’. A war between people.

People are purposely being fired against each other and it is so awful to bear witness to, especially as an Empath.

Within the political world there has always been different parties, people standing for different reasons and rights. But never before have I seen such animosity stirred up, supposedly in the name of ‘standing for what is right’.

We have campaigns telling the world how we should be more accepting of others, but at the same time we are shown to hate those who don’t have the same opinions as us. It is considered ok to attack anyone who does not hold the same view, political or other, or to make assumptions on another’s beliefs and ideologies.

From where I stand, the message coming across is that its ok to silence, intimidate or attack those who stand up for what they believe in, if it doesn’t fit in with the narrative of the mainstream media. But how is this in any way progress?

But the truth is it’s not meant to be progress. It’s meant to throw us off track and keep us from our light.

A couple of months ago I watched a ‘Roast of Rob Lowe’ on Comedy Central. The panel of Roasters, and the audience, was filled with celebrities and well-known faces. It was just like any other Roast, of below-the-belt-banter, until Anne Coulthard got up. Talk about tumbleweeds.  

I must admit, I don’t know much about Anne Coulthard other than she is an advocate for Trump. But when she stood up, to do her Roast, the audience jeered her in such a hateful way and showed her nothing but contempt that it was difficult to watch. If the jeering was done in the ‘banterish’ way of the Roast, it might be laughed at, but it was hate-mob mentality and seriously uncomfortable viewing. Revulsion was written on the majority’s faces. And it sent a message to say if you don’t think like us or agree with us, then this is how we will treat you. This is extreme narcissism and it is scary that it seems to be so accepted!

I get that everyone has their own political opinions and beliefs. And so they should. Politics has always been an ugly arena; but the intimidation that is now happening is bullying and is not the behaviour that should be passed off as acceptable in a supposedly progressive society. We cannot be told that bullying is bad then show it as entertainment. Unless, of course, if the desired effect is to turn people against each other…

Celebrities are major influencers. People respect and admire them. Seeing celebs behaving towards others with contempt, because of their political leanings, shows the viewing world that this is the way to treat anyone who holds differing opinions.

Encouraging hate will never encourage acceptance. It just distracts and divides. The messages being sent out by the media are both confusing and contradictory. By keeping us distracted and divided it keeps us from finding unity with each other and from finding our own power.

I try to bypass anything that holds the content of hate online, but by spending a lot of time on my laptop, I sometimes find myself being drawn in on YouTube or something. When I do get drawn in, it leaves me deflated and depressed (and in serious need of chocolate). 

There are so many messages of hate being sent out in the guise of ‘striving for acceptance’, but the way these messages are portrayed are just so off track.

Don’t get me wrong, I am all for acceptance, and in a perfect world we would all be capable of accepting everyone for their ‘differences’. But one thing is for sure, hate will always negate acceptance. 

There will always be differing political opinions, religious beliefs, cultural differences and varied outlooks on life. As I have said many times before, we are all different with different life paths (even as Empaths), and that is a good thing, it’s the way it is meant to be. It is so easy to waste this precious life focused on what others do or say and what they believe in, instead of focusing on finding our truth and purpose.

If you pay too much attention to the negative hype, being purposely aggravated, then you will be badly affected. By avoiding the media fracas, you will save yourself a lot of unnecessary suffering and heartache. You will feel more positive about yourself and others. Read this post to learn why Empaths are more at risk from the negativity.

We are in the midst of some incredible times for evolvement; which can be easily missed when focusing on manufactured negativity. I believe that all this BS means we are on the precipice of incredible changes for all (things get worse before they get better), but we still have to participate in any change for the better by keeping ourselves in a higher space. Doing a daily reset helps with this.

When spending your time doing what you love, and away from the media, it automatically elevates you. It also helps keep you protected from the dark energy stirred up out there. You then radiate a more powerful energy which positively impacts those you come into contact with.

Ok, that’s my musings for today.

Hope you are all having a fantastic summer… or winter.

Until next time…

Diane

©Diane Kathrine

 

Please help support me and my work

PLEASE HELP SUPPORT ME AND MY WORK