I have often been asked questions such as: ‘how can I be of service to others without being drained?’ or ‘I want to help, how should I do it?’
And, although I have replied to those who have asked these kind of questions in comments, I decided to write a mini-post about it.
It is an inbred trait for Empaths to want to help others, if only in an indirect way, and it can be incredibly soul-destroying to see another suffering and not be able to help them.
Especially when it’s obvious they are either too ashamed to ask for help for fear of appearing weak, or if they have gone through life being the ‘strong one’ and when their life starts falling apart, they are afraid of being judged for having failed.
Everyone needs help and direction at some point, no matter how evolved they are. But it is still up to each person to seek out the answers they need and they have to be ready to ask for help and/or be willing to make changes.
We see suffering as bad, and it is.
But it is through suffering that humans really learn and grow. It can also be an important rite of passage into spiritual consciousness.
That said, everyone needs a pointer at some time.
So, how can an Empath be there for another without suffering compassion overwhelm?
One of the easiest ways is to simply listen.
By listening, it is healing to the one being heard.
People don’t really listen anymore. Most are too busy thinking about their own story to hear what others are trying to say, or are just waiting for their turn to talk.
But to Empaths, listening comes as naturally as breathing.
This is why Empaths are often so sought out, because they listen and they hear. The downside to this is taking on too much, especially when another is repeating a victim-story, like a broken record, and refuses to help themselves by making any changes.
Some people also need professional help, and guiding them towards it may be the best option.
However, to prevent overwhelm, it is always wise to have time limits, when listening to others.
With each person, time limits will be different.
For some people, five minutes is enough time, with others an hour or so is ok.
But, for extra protection, always use grounding and protecting techniques before and after. See here and here.
Another incredible way to serve others, is by serving self first.
When we work on ourselves, in mind, body and spirit, we become balanced and empowered. Our vibration then speeds up and we emit a much more powerful energy. This type of energy is uplifting and healing to those around us.
So, just by empowering ourselves we can help empower others, and it will not drain us of our own energy.
If you want to learn more about becoming an Empowered Empath,this post is worth a read.
Living in this heavily populated world, Empaths face many challenges. If it’s not having others’ negativities dumped on them, they get drained of vital energy just by spending too much time in public.
Learning to set energetic boundaries is, of course, a given for those of a Sensitive nature and many Empaths are hardwired into automatically doing this. However, sometimes life just gets in the way.
We all need gentle reminders, from time to time, about what we could be doing to protect ourselves and thus make life more enjoyable. And this is what I hope to present in this guide for the Empath.
For Empaths, wanting to block out all external emotions and energies would, no doubt, be a priority. But it is not always that cut and dry. For one thing, she might have already tried every energy-blocking technique known to man, without any success.
And then there are the questions: why is it Empaths feel and take on what they do, emotionally, is it not for a purpose? In taking on these negative energies are they not helping rid the world of them?
The answer to those question are debatable. But the fact is, all Empaths need to learn to protect themselves from wayward energies, and know how to stay grounded, so they can continue to function in everyday life.
Out and About
When an Empath is alone in people-congested places, they may soak up the highly charged energies no sooner than having stepped over the building’s threshold.
If you are one who finds being in public areas, such as shopping malls and cinemas, unbearable, to the point of avoiding them at all costs, there are some techniques you could try that may help:
Take a Friend: Being with another person acts as a buffer and helps diffuse external energies. This lessens the impact, when spending time in public places. It also serves as a pleasant distraction and takes your mind off what you are feeling.
Chances are, after the shopping trip or outing, you may still feel drained but your experience will have been a much more pleasant one.
If taking a friend, or family member, is not possible find a grounding technique, that works for you, and use it before going out. Below are some you could try:
Power Poses: A power pose is generally anything that opens up the body. They can be as simple as opening up one’s arms wide (so your body is in the shape of a cross) and taking long, slow breaths through the nose. Holding a gentle smile is further empowering.
If you are familiar with yoga, a Starfish pose (standing with wide legs and arms) is ideal, as is a Warrior pose with open arms.
Holding the power pose for a couple of minutes before leaving home, or entering an energy-hostile environment, serves in uplifting and expanding one’s energy field. This is opposed to how an Empath often goes out into the world, wanting to feel small and invisible.
Grounding visualizations: These could be anything from visualising roots coming from your feet, grounding you to the earth, to mentally building a halo of white light around your body and expanding it with your breath.
Take a couple of minutes to quieten the mind before attempting.
Affirmations: Positive mini-declarations repeated in the mind can serve in being uplifting, empowering and protective. Statements such as: ‘I am empowered ‘or ‘I am in control’, instantly, and positively, change your mind-set, and your vibration, and thus make you better equipped to handle excessive energies.
Find one that works for you, suitable for the time and place.
Music therapy: Taking your music and earphones is a huge help when out and about. Listening to music you love creates an inner-expansion. It uplifts your energy and creates a protective ‘bliss bubble’ around you. This energy expansion enables you to glide through public-places seemingly unaffected.
It is best to get into the ‘music zone’ before entering a peopled place.
Breath-work: There are many grounding and mind quietening methods available, such as meditation, that need a committed, daily practise to reap the full benefits. However, the breathing methods, included in the post below are meditative techniques and can be done in a hurry or when one is feeling out of sorts.
You may need to play around with different breathing techniques to find one which works for you. They can be used before entering or whilst in a busy place.
Please see this post for various breathing techniques.
Bedtime
If you are one who doesn’t like sleep-snuggling, or having to sleep close to your partner in bed, no matter how much you love them, you are not alone.
Having sleeping-space is essential for the Empath.
Most Empaths loathe having anyone get in their ‘energy-space’, day or night, but as sleep-time is crucial for recharging, it is even more important they are allowed it.
If you share a bed, and it is not possible for you to have your own bedroom, opt for the largest size bed available, if space permits.
If you still struggle sleeping near your partner or wake-up feeling drained, use one of the above grounding techniques and adapt them to bedtime mode.
Eating
Know your food and how it affects you. Listen to what your body is telling you about what is and isn’t right for you. If, for example, you have a nagging feeling that dairy is causing you to have an allergic reaction, you could try the 30 day exclusion challenge, to see if it is.
This involves abstaining from all dairy (or whatever you suspect does not agree with you, be it chocolate, tomatoes, alcohol or GMOs) for 30 days. After that time, gradually introduce it back into your diet. If you have a big reaction to it, you know you are intolerant, allergic or energetically incompatible and are best removing it from your diet.
Over a period of about 15 years, I’ve tried many eating and exercise plans. I have tried and trained in many holistic therapies and healing, and researched the benefits of nutrients. I always believed that the answers to my healing lay in the metaphysical, and if I made myself more ‘spiritual’ I would find life easier… I hadn’t taken into consideration that it didn’t matter how many hours I sat in meditation or doing yoga, or how many spiritual texts I read, if I was putting poison into my physical body, no amount of meditation or spiritual awareness was going to balance me.
Of everything I have tried over the years, holistically, spiritually and energetically, the most profound changes happened to me when I changed my diet!
I have written about benefits of changing the diet before (and will do again, and again), but as I consider it to be one of the best things you can do to aid physical healing and spiritual growth, especially for Empaths, I will keep spreading the word.
We may all be very different, with different spiritual, nutritional and physical requirements, but none of us will benefit from taking drugs or eating drug-like food…
Because they tend to be highly reactive, Empaths react more to drug-like foods than those not of a Sensitive nature. High reactive people taste the bitterness in lemons more than others, feel emotional and physical pain more, go red in the face easier and are affected by certain foods, drugs and alcohol worse than those who are not highly reactive.
High reactives are responsive to different vibrations of energy. Everything is energy vibrating at different frequencies and that includes what we eat and drink: the faster the vibration, the higher the frequency. Empaths are negatively affected by anything of a low vibration. Certain foods, drugs and alcohol all have a low vibrational energy and bring the Empath down fast.
If you suspect your diet is impacting your health, and Empath ways, and are keen to learn of all the negative ways your diet can impact Empath life click here.
It is also wise to take note how your food is prepared. Food made in an angry or unhappy environment will carry that energy and thus show up within you.
Most Empaths benefit from having mainly homemade food, so they know exactly what energy goes into their meals.
Socializing and Stimulants
Unfortunately, any kind of stimulant (alcohol, drugs, etc.) only serve in weakening the Empath (as they do any other human). Under the influence, it may feel like external energies are blocked but unfortunately this is not the case. They still seep in and still need to be dealt with.
When in company, other people’s emotions may show up in the Empath as aggression or an overly dominant ego on the evening of consumption or as a physical and emotional hangover from hell the day after.
If you don’t like the idea of giving up your favourite tipple, or social life, try using grounding techniques before an evening out and drink lots of water throughout the evening. Water has both a cleansing and grounding effect. Also include lots of alkalizing foods in your diet. By keeping your body in a more alkaline state it helps keep Empath balance and prevents alcohol doing as much damage.
Friends
The longer the Empath has known a friend, the more impact the friend can have on their energy. As you would imagine this could be a good or bad thing, depending on the relationship.
Knowing how to navigate your friendships serves in offering healthier and happier relationships.
Friends’ energy and how it affects those of a Sensitive nature will change along with their age and life circumstances. If down or depressed, a friend can unintentionally take the Empath down with them.
In theses cases one has to learn to emotionally unplug. One can still listen and be there, but in a detached way.
Also, be very wary of an unwanted energy drain.
We all know people who drain energy, otherwise known as the ‘Energy Vampires’, but when a friend, who isn’t normally a drainer, is experiencing a tough time their energy-sucking tentacles may seek out an instant uplift from anywhere they can get it. (Please see here, here, here for more ways to stay protected).
To avoid being a friend’s ‘energy-replacement-meal’, watch for any drain and where it is coming from. It is normally be from one of four of the main energy centres (chakras): sacral (below belly), solar plexus (mid belly), heart (heart area) or throat (front of throat) and it may be felt by a pull or ache in that area.
Wherever you feel the drain, cover that area immediately with your hands or arms. It is not by chance that we cross our arms over our stomach or chest in social situations; we are subconsciously stopping an energy-drain.
Empaths tend to be very faithful to their friends and keep them in their life for the long-haul. For this reason, it is a good idea to choose friends wisely.
For the Empath finding their calling or vocation can be a challenge of epic proportions.
Living a lie, through having to pretend they like doing a job which they don’t, or sell a product they do not believe in, is nothing short of torture for the Empath.
As eighty percent of the workforce do not enjoy their job, this does not make for an energy-efficient or happy working environment (another obstacle for the Empath).
If you listen, your Internal Guidance System will continuously present you with vocational options, perhaps as interests or passions.
If searching for your dream job, or just a new direction in life, here are some questions that may ignite the answer:
What are your passions?
What do you love to do?
What do you believe in?
What would you wake up excited to do each day?
What can you not live without doing?
What engages you?
What interest keeps coming back to you?
If you could change the world for the better, how would you do it?
Roadblocks
Roadblocks are what stop you going down your desired or chosen route in life. They can be seen through sickness, redundancy, depression, loss of money and social status or non-starting projects. They can unexpectedly pop up out of nowhere, take you off your current journey and bring your life to a standstill or send you off in a new direction.
When encountering roadblocks it may seem like they are purely an unfair punishment, but this comes down to your perspective. They are normally presented as a detour and a way to make changes to your life’s journey when refusing to listen to your IGS.
This detour may involve a long and winding scenic-route, which also happens to be an uncomfortable, seemingly never-ending, bumpy road. But again, this is down to your perspective.
You have a choice: you can get wrapped up in the inconvenience and discomfort of the long ‘scenic-route’, focusing only on that, or you can concentrate on the ever-changing landscape as it passes and be grateful for being given a chance to change.
Everything presented to us in life is a gift, even roadblocks, and are something to learn and grow from… if only you allow yourselves to see it.
Exercise
Exercise is essential to an Empath’s wellbeing. It works both the physical and energetic bodies, and helps clear stagnant or negative energy.
Sadly, we live in a society that promotes a ‘no-pain-no-gain’ philosophy towards exercise and a focus on sculpting the muscles instead of healing the body and mind. Exercise should be fun and liberating, not torturous or painful (unless you enjoy that ).
There are many ways to exercise and it doesn’t have to be costly or complicated. It can be as simple as turning on some funky music and shaking your hips around the kitchen. Dancing when no one is watching is unbelievably uplifting and you get to make your own moves with the beat of the music.
Running or walking in nature, freestyle dance, where there are no rules, or one of the many forms of yoga, are some of the best forms of exercise for the Empath. These could be done alone at home, and there is no need for a gym membership.
Swimming in the sea, or a lake, would also be great, if you’re fortunate enough to have one nearby.
A gym-class is not always the best environment for the Empath, especially if it has a very ego-driven or body-conscious atmosphere and adorned by lots of mirrors.
Some Empaths pick up negative residual energy left on mirrors. If there have been many insecure, or body conscious, people gazing into gym-mirrors (or mirrors in clothes shops, etc.) an Empath may feel the lingering energy of these insecurities and take them on as their own.
Relationships
For the Empath, relationships often prove to be a complicated area of life. But also very rewarding when they find a compatible mate (who very likely won’t be an Empath but may still be sensitive).
Empaths are a greatly misunderstood bunch. If they seem aloof or disconnected (after suffering Empath overwhelm) it may take a while for their detachment, and need for time alone, not to be taken personally by a prospective partner.
When one is romantically connected to another, it can make the energetic connection complicated.
Reading someone, who holds no emotional ties, comes quite easily for the Empath. However, when there is a strong emotional bind it can distort one’s ability to read energies clearly. This can lead to confusion and frustration, especially in the early building, days of a relationship and even further down the road.
Not everyone is as inclined to be as honest as an Empath; especially if they have grown-up or worked in an environment where lying is ‘quietly’ seen as acceptable (it is surprising how often this is the case). This is a huge bugbear for the Empath because they feel the energy of a lie, but not always what the lie is. In some cases, this leads to paranoia which in turn leads to ungrounded accusations and arguments.
A whole book could be dedicated to the relationship highs and lows of an Empath and how to handle every situation (see The Empath Awakening for more on Empath relationships). But in brief, it’s safe to say that the best way to be in any relationship is honest (unless the truth will cause unnecessary pain) and never be afraid to show your True-Self.
It’s always good to remember that every relationship, no matter how brief, offers valuable lessons. Even toxic relationships, filled with strife and arguments, can show areas of life that need to be worked on or improved.
Comfort Zone
Allowing yourself to step from your comfort zone, on a daily basis, allows for growth in all areas of your life. It enables you to face your fears and, in facing them, it gives you a greater capacity to deal with any negative emotions you meet.
When we stay comfortable, we stay small and don’t expand. As the saying goes:
‘If it doesn’t challenge you it doesn’t change you!’
– Fred Devito
Stepping from the comfort zone can be done by going further than you would like during exercise, by making a phone-call you’ve been putting off for months, by telling someone you love them, or anything that makes you squirm but which you know you should do.
Getting Out of Your Head
Thoughts can be destructive to your health and wellbeing, especially when they are negative and repetitive. Empaths tend to spend a lot of time in their heads, which is great when thoughts are creative, happy or enlightening. But spend too much time around certain people, or places, and those happy thoughts can quickly turn into painful memories, anger or notions of being wronged or unfairly treated by another.
You may not realise those irrational thoughts, that are on a perpetual time-loop, were ignited by being around certain others, as they don’t always kick in till a day or two after exposure.
So, how do you stop them? It’s not easy but it can be done. The best techniques involves externalising your awareness or by distracting the mind.
Externalising Awareness: One of the best ways to get out of the head is to focus your awareness outside of yourself, using a meditative technique called mindfulness.
This can be done almost anywhere and involves focusing on something outside of your mind. You could gaze at a flickering candle or pay close attention to your scenery as you pass it by (obviously not to be done whilst driving).
If you like walking in nature look up at the trees and notice all you can about the bark, branches and leaves, see the different cloud formations in the sky or inspect the wild flowers growing within the foliage.
Thought Distraction: When your thoughts are on negative-overdrive, doing activities which allow you to indulge them is not advisable. You need to distract yourself. One of the quickest ways to do this is by stepping out of your comfort zone.
When your mind becomes preoccupied by anything which causes discomfort it stops engaging dark or repetitive thoughts. A few minutes exercising usually does the trick:
If you practise yoga do a pose you find challenging or which requires stamina or concentration, such as the Plank, Warrior, Tree or Crow.
Do some on the spot exercise: march, jog, star jumps, twist jumps, etc.
Just be wary of injury before doing any on the spot exercise. When your muscles, or joints, are cold they are not as pliable and are more prone to injury. Start slowly and build up the intensity.
Conclusion
As we are all here on our own journey with learning experiences unique to us, not all the tips and advice offered here will be helpful to everyone. But until you try them for yourself you will not know what works or what doesn’t.
As an Empath, you may have come into life purely to gain experience of feeling others’ emotions. And because of this, it is important to remember that just because one Sensitive has learnt how to deal with external energies and you haven’t, even after trying every technique in the book, doesn’t mean you’re doing something wrong or being punished. It may simply mean you have not yet achieved a certain lesson from a certain experience.
It could also be that you are capable of enduring more hardships in life and your mountains are higher and harder to climb than most and in turn you will be learning more.
Hope this helps on your Empath journey.
Until next time…
Diane
Do you want to transform your Empath life in the most amazing way and enjoy complete emotional freedom? If the answer is yes, then this book is for You. Click here for more information.
Modern life often brings daily challenges for an Empath. If it’s not dealing with their own ‘issues’, it’s picking up on the pained emotions of the people around them or the stressed collective energy of the masses.
Sometimes it can look like there is no way to get away from the many challenges that life throws an Empath. Especially when it feels like when one hurdle is jumped, another one appears.
But one thing all Empaths generally have is a strong Inner Guidance (IG). It is a guidance they can depend on, if they tune into it, to guide them through the challenges of ‘Sensitive life.’
So, what is an Empath’s Inner Guidance (IG) and how do they tune into it?
Basically, your IG is heard through the quiet voice that whispers to you when you’re troubled. It is felt through strong gut-sensations and your intuitive ideas.
When in tune with your Inner Guidance, Empath life becomes smoother sailing. But the downside to this guidance is, it is easily manipulated by external energy, from the emotions of others, or by internal chemical imbalances that are caused by stress, chakra or endocrine imbalances.
In particular, anything that lowers your vibration can impact your ability to tune into your Inner Empath Guidance.
I mentioned in my last post that sensitivities are on the rise for many people (and not just the Empaths) in the form of allergies, intolerances, negative emotional responses and depression. These are clear signs that something is amiss within the body, mind and spirit.
Finding Balance Within
The problem is, many people, Empaths included, tend to focus on either the development of the spiritual or the physical self, but not both at the same time. They may pray, meditate or chant for hours each day and spend every waking moment, wondering how they could serve others, but they do no exercise, they may smoke twenty cigarettes a day and eat nothing but processed food. Or they may go to the other extreme of exercising two to three hours a day and are fastidious about what they eat, but have no ethical or spiritual practice.
However, if you are to find complete balance and harmony, and tune into your Inner Guidance, you need to work towards having the mind, body and spirit in unison.
The body is the physical, which is also home to our spirit, or soul, our true eternal-self. The soul carries all our life experiences and knowledge and it is the only thing we get to take with us when we leave this body. Our mind is what makes us, well, us.
Generally, when we have found balance in the body and mind, through avoiding anything that lowers our vibration, and strive to live an honest life, we feel happy. When we ignore the voice of our higher-self and our strong gut sensations, in regards to health and wellbeing, however, our life becomes more turbulent and uncomfortable.
If you regularly read my posts, you may have noticed I am a massive advocate for taking self-responsibility. It is my belief that if we want to see change, within our life, we have to make the necessary changes.
We hold all the answers. We just need to tune into the voice of our higher self.
Tune Into Your Inner Guidance
Although we may each have teachers, who plant seeds of knowledge and offer us clues about which direction we should be going in life, it is up to each of us to do it for ourselves. We have to decide what is or isn’t right for us.
It is easy to become dependant on another’s teachings or words of wisdom. But everyone is an individual and each life journey should be a reflection of this.
The real answers lie within. You hold the key to your own happiness and freedom. You only find your keys by following your own Inner Guidance.
The first step to hearing your guiding voice is through having a quiet mind, and learning to recognise and trust its voice.
There are well over ten years worth of posts, here on this blog, written for the Empath. So feel free to browse to find ways to better work with your Inner Guidance to become the Empowered Empath you deserve to be! These posts, here and here, are a good place to start.
Alternatively, if you want to find ways to help you tune into your Inner Guidance and live a more fulfilled life, you may want to go the fast-tracked route and read my book 7 Secrets of the Sensitive. It is filled with information to help the Empath find balance and live an empowered life.
The majority of us have no idea how much tension we hold within our body. Even without exercise and sports, our muscles are constantly stimulated, either through the stresses of modern life or from taking on the emotional energy of others. All of which impacts our emotional wellbeing.
Even the TV programs we watch of an evening for entertainment can have an effect of firing up the mind which then stimulates the muscles, further tensing them.
Any painful emotions, whether our own or those we pick up from others, are stored within the muscles which leads to greater muscle fatigue and stress.
When our muscles are constantly contracted and stressed they fuel the sympathetic nervous system (fight or flight).
Stressed Muscles Leads to a Stressed Empath Mind!
Did you know even now, whilst reading this, you are holding tension somewhere in your body?
If you take your awareness to your face you may notice that your forehead, jaw or eyes are not relaxed. If you travel further into the body you may find your shoulders hunched or your wrists extended back, your legs, hips or back might be in an awkward or unnatural position, all creating pressure in the muscles and joints. But, until this was pointed out, you were unaware you were holding any tension.
We could go through the entire body, but I think it’s safe to say you will be unwittingly holding tension somewhere. Not only is this depleting the body of vital energy that most can ill-afford to lose but it causes many other problems: It is prematurely ageing, it raises blood pressure, lowers the immune system and unnecessarily heightens Empath stress.
What To Do About It
Relax! In yoga, it is known that the relaxation, at the end of a class, is the most beneficial part of the practice. Not only is it time for the body to rest but it’s the time the muscles can let go of any tension they are holding.
One of the best and easiest ways to get the muscles to relax and soften is to tense them first.
By training the muscles to soften and loosen, through relaxation, it switches on the parasympathetic nervous system. This in turn slows the breathing, lowers blood pressure, initiates deep relaxation of body and mind, and allows healing to occur.
Here are some more of the benefits:
Muscle Relaxation Benefits
Reduces fatigue
Anti-ageing
Lowers blood pressure
Boosts immune system
Induces restful sleep
Allows for muscle regeneration
Switches on parasympathetic nervous system
Promotes mind stillness
Aides in general well-being.
Here’s a quick and easy relaxation technique:
Muscle relaxation technique:
Lie on the floor or a bed (for anyone suffering back problems: a bolster or cushion under knees is helpful).
Starting at the feet, tense the both feet at the same time for five to ten seconds, then release.
Work up through legs, torso, arms, shoulders, head and face, tensing and relaxing each body part in turn (If time is short, you could tense the lower part of body first, then the upper half, finishing on the face.).
When you’ve tensed each body part, focus on the whole body and allow it to relax and go floppy. Feel it melting into the floor and let go.
Close your eyes and stay for a while in this deep state of relaxation.
Not only does the above exercise promote relaxation but it also aids in stilling the mind. Relaxation can be done at any time of day but it is great to do at bedtime or after exercise.
If, as an Empath, you suffer any kind of stress conditions or chronic fatigue, doing full-body muscle tensing and relaxation is a great help to your overall well-being.
Also, if you are suffering a lot of emotional stress, you may find this post on Essential Oils for the Empath beneficial. Or visit this post to discover how yoga can help you as an Empath.
When you don’t have control of your thoughts, your thoughts can shape your life into something you don’t want. In other words, your thoughts create your reality.
Thoughts are so powerful that they can be the root cause of illness. And because Empaths are ‘big thinkers’ they tend to be at a higher risk of developing stress-related illnesses due to overthinking.
Thoughts feed emotions and emotions feed thoughts. Negative thought patterns become a dangerous repetitive cycle. Due to the fact an Empath picks up the emotions from those around them, which they may claim as their own, their thoughts can be influenced by the energy of others.
If negative emotions are stirred up by your overbearing thoughts, your emotions and thoughts are ruling your life in a very unproductive way. But, never fear, there is a way to take back control:
Yogic Breathing…
For all the many benefits yoga has to offer the body, it was primarily designed to still the mind. Which makes sense, for it is only when the mind is calm and quiet that we truly find peace.
Ancient yogis knew that whilst the body or mind was in pain or discomfort, negative thoughts would remain dominant.
One of the quickest ways to still disruptive thoughts, and help calm the emotions that caused them, is through yogic breathing techniques.
Not only are the different yogic breathing techniques energizing and uplifting, they are also calming, relaxing and rejuvenating.
For an Empath, yoga breathing (pranayama) also helps lessen the impact of negative energy picked up from others. Their practice also helps keep a strong aura. Having a strong aura will protect you against psychic attack and leaky aura syndrome.
In challenging times, yoga and the yogic breathing systems are a blessing and should be part of every Empath’s life.
Below is a list of easy breathing exercises, and links to their demonstrations on YouTube, that you can use to calm the body and mind.
Nadi Shodhana (alternate nostril breathing) is a technique that quietens the mind and blisses you out. It is brilliant to do before bedtime, especially if you have a wired monkey mind. It is also perfect for balancing masculine and feminine energies within the body.
For an instructional video click here. or to learn more about balancing masculine and feminine energy click here.
Kapalbhati (bellows breath) is a fantastic energizing breathing technique that also works and strengthens the core stomach muscles. It is best to do this in the morning (always on an empty stomach), or when one needs a quick energy boost. It is perfect for eliminating raging emotions that linger around the solar plexus area (seat of emotions). A few rounds of kapalbhati, will leave you with a quiet, yet energised, mind. For an instructional video click here.
Ujayi (victorious breath) is commonly used within yogic asana practise to create heat within the body. It keeps the mind focused and helps remove toxins. I find this technique great to use when in places such as supermarkets, where there are lots of different ‘people’ energies swirling round. Ujayi helps keep you centred and helps prevent emotional overwhelm . For instructional video click here
Dynamic Asana Practice: This is a flowing yoga practice that moves with the breath. Instead of holding poses static, for a certain length of time, you move in and out of the postures with the rhythm of your breath. Again, brilliant for quietening a busy Empath mind, but also great for alleviating tension, and building strength and flexibility within the body. (I have not attached a link to this as it’s best to learn under a qualified instructor).
To reap the greatest benefits of any yoga breathing techniques you should try to practise every day, if only for 5 minutes.
Any yogic breathing system should be approached gradually. When first attempted they may cause dizziness or sometimes anxiety. This, however, quickly passes, so don’t be put off.
Alternatively, if you want an incredibly easy relaxation technique click here to learn more.
Hope this helps on your Empath journey.
Are you ready to transfor
If you want to discover more about being an Empath click here.
It is incredible how quickly clutter builds within the home and the mind. How many of us hold onto things long after they’ve outlived their use?
Have you kept old clothes for when you lose weight or hope they may come back in fashion one day?
Or have you been given a gift you didn’t really like, but kept to avoid hurting another’s feelings?
I think it’s safe to say most could answer yes to the above questions. But hoarding, even just a bit, soon sees your home overloaded with junk. Bad news for Empaths or those of a Sensitive nature.
An overly cluttered house leads to an overly cluttered energy field.
Clutter equates to stagnated energy and is extremely draining to the body and mind. Even clutter the eye cannot see has a debilitating effect on the psyche and creates an overcrowded feeling.
If you have a crowded house (and I don’t mean with people) you may not realize how much it depletes your energy. Clutter causes sluggishness, apathy and an uninspired Empath mind.
Empaths tend to have an inbuilt loathing of clutter, whether they are aware of their gift or not, and this is because they feel ‘clutter energy’ dragging them down. They may opt for an uncomplicated decor, without too much fuss, for the simple reason all objects hold energy. But over the years clutter unintentionally builds.
Many years ago, I read a book by Karen Kingston called: ‘Clear Your Clutter with Feng Shui, it really resonated with me and inspired me to have a full-on house detox.
I hatched a plan to rid the home of all unwanted, unused and unhelpful items we had hoarded. My husband and I ploughed through the house, room by room, and cleared tonnes of stuff (slight exaggeration, but you will be surprised how much is crammed into the smallest draw). I have a minimalistic décor style and have never liked visual clutter. So everything removed came out of cupboards, draws and wardrobes.
It was amazing how clean, fresh and liberated we both felt afterwards. Removing the clutter also cleared energetic debris held within the unused items.
Where to start
The first thing you need to summon when de-cluttering is bravery. Yes, it may sound silly to suggest being brave when it comes to house-clearing, but it’s often exactly what you need. Letting anything go causes discomfort. Fear always rear its ugly head when making any changes in life. When de-cluttering, fear likes to perch on your shoulder and whisper in your ear, telling you how much you need those unneeded items.
Hoarding is born from the fear of lack. By clearing your clutter you face this fear. When your home is full there is no room for anything new to come into your life. In making space, you send out a message to the universe that you are open to receive (but hopefully not to more clutter).
To find out whether you really need something in your life simply ask this question: How will this item improve my life? If you can’t come up with an answer (other than it won’t) it’s probably time to ditch or give it to charity.
Mental Clutter
Clearing the clutter doesn’t just have to be of your home, you can have an internal-clutter-clearing session.
Disposing of old beliefs, traits or thought patterns is both liberating and rejuvenating. Granted, they’re not as easy to be rid of as belongings, but probably ten times more beneficial.
A trait that will serve you no-end in eliminating is overly judgemental behaviour.
Judgemental behaviour carries a dark, cluttering energy
Although Empaths may dislike judging others it doesn’t mean they won’t harshly judge themselves. Being judgemental is imprisoning and causes untold harm. And it doesn’t have to be vindictive to be damaging: Believing you are not good enough, or another is more worthy is destructive. Self-judgements shrinks your self-worth and clutters your mind with insecurities.
Being judgemental catches all Empaths unaware. But when you work to clear it you become more conscious and automatically disengage from judgemental musings before they have chance to do damage.
Clutter Clearing Check List for the Internal and External
If you are in doubt of what you should or shouldn’t keep in your life, see the following questions:
Does this serve me today?
Will this serve me in the foreseeable future?
Can this serve anyone else?
Why am I holding onto this?
Will keeping/holding onto this make me happy?
A word of warning: Within days of having a clear-out your mind will play tricks on you. You will suddenly find use for everything you de-cluttered. You may not have used an item for 5 years but your mind will find a job for it once you’ve binned it. Just know that this is part of the de-cluttering process and it will pass.
Hope this post helps you on your Empath journey.
Until next time
Diane
Donations can be made here. Thank You for your kind support.
The main aspect of being an Empath is feeling and experiencing the emotions of others. For example, an Empath can tell when another is nervous, when one is angry or sad. They may enter shopping centres, or busy peopled places, and feel an array of strange sensations wash over them like a tidal wave. This is due to the gift of being able to feel…
Granted, not all Empaths consider the ability to experience other people’s emotional energy as a gift. In fact, some would say the opposite. But that is often because they have emotional or physical imbalances to work through (which may take some time), and this makes feeling the emotions of others as intrusive and ‘just too much!’
Before they become aware of their birthright, some Empaths may not give much thought to all they experience, energetically, because what they feel happens so naturally. It is not something they force, nor do they have to work at it. They may go through life assuming everyone experiences the same, not realizing that what they ‘feel’ is a unique part of Empath life.
But once the Empath’s eyes are open to their incredible traits and abilities they have, they can’t unsee them. All those ‘feelings’ finally have an explanation.
Other than their ability to sense the emotions of others, most Empaths also have incredible intuition…
Empath intuition comes in many forms, but for most it comes as strong gut sensations, having the ability to read others, or just having a ‘Knowing’ about future outcomes.
Intuition can be developed (see this post for more details), if that’s what one wants, but most Empaths already have very dependable intuition (in the way of gut-feelings) without having to try at it.
Some ignore their gut-feelings for their own reasons: Maybe they want to see the best in others, or perhaps they don’t believe in their intuition as much as they should. But every Empath’s gut-feelings are there to warn, serve and protect them from experiencing anything they don’t need to.
The strong sense of intuition an Empath has is both their guide and their best friend.
They may question their intuition, especially if it does not fit in with what their mind or ego wants, but they would be wise to listen to it.
Strong urges, feelings, premonitions or notions in any shape or form, happen for a reason and it is in one’s best interest to take heed of them.
The reason behind them may not be revealed for days, weeks, months or even years but they will have a purpose that will eventually reveal itself. For more information on tuning into Empath intuition see this post.
Another one of the many traits an Empath has is the ability to feel the energy of the days of the week.
Many love the vibe of a Saturday morning, because it feels calm, peaceful and uplifting, but are not so keen on the energy of Sunday evening, there’s a reason for that too…
Empaths pick up on collective energy.
The start of the weekend, when the majority are off work, can feel deliciously freeing. Late weekend evenings (Sunday evening for example), can carry that heavy vibe, as people prepare to return to jobs they dislike or even dread.
Some Empaths blame their workday feelings on their own job dissatisfaction, not realizing they are picking up on the energy of those around them.
But not only do Empaths have the ability to feel energy, some can also see it.
I remember, from an early age, seeing energy fields (auras), around the animate and inanimate, without even trying.
I loved lying on the grass, on a warm summer’s day, and watching the hazy energy around the trees as they swayed gently in the breeze. I assumed this was something everyone could see/do.
It was only in adulthood, that I discovered not everyone could see energy fields. I realized it was just another trait of being an Empath and Sensitive to energy… There are many more.
An Empath’s traits may strengthen or weaken with passing years, depending on life circumstances. But they have these traits for a reason, and a great part of Empath life is figuring them out and learning how they can guide them towards the life they were born to lead.
Want to learn more about Empath traits? Click here.
If you are an Empath, chances are you will carry many introvert tendencies, even if you consider yourself to be extrovert.
The fact is introversion is something that tends to go hand-in-hand with life as a Sensitive. Even if one started life exhibiting more extrovert ways, the way the world makes an Empath ‘feel’ can trigger or build introvert tendencies such as: a regular need for solitude, not enjoying spending time around people, experiencing social anxiety when around crowds, etc.
Being an introvert in this extrovert-driven world can bring many challenges and hurdles to overcome. So much so, it can leave many Empaths completely out of place and lost. It’s as though they’ve been dumped into a reality that is not a fit, and one has to live a lie just to show up in society.
However, when you come to accept and understand ‘your ways’ and the unique ways of being an introvert Empath, life not only makes more sense but you recognise it’s ok to be who you are. You no longer feel you have to change your behaviour in order to ‘fit in’.
Below is an interesting post, written by Gregg Prescott, of in5d.com, that throws more light on some of the interesting ways of an introvert: (Copyright in5d and Gregg Prescott, M.S.. The following content may be freely reproduced in full or in part in digital form.)
Why do introverts tend to be highly spiritual?
Society dictates that we follow specific images projected by the main stream media, so why do introverts tend to rebel from these stereotypes?
Introverts tend to look within for answers versus having the need for societal approval. Often, extroverts will view the introvert as being antisocial, stuck up or as loners, but even with these labels, the introvert will stand his or her ground with complete disregard for how others perceive him or her.
If you are an introvert, then you will find complete comfort in solitude. You often find yourself immersed in deep thought and contemplation. Your need for approval by others is significantly less than the extrovert as you realize that all answers come from within.
While you may partake on social occasions, you often enjoy simply watching the environment around you versus being the center of attention, which many introverts try to avoid. On a metaphysical level, the introvert realizes how we are all connected and does not need the external approval and attention that is often sought after by the extrovert.
Approximately 75% of the world are extroverts, which makes the introvert the minority, yet the introvert will not succumb to societal pressure in order to conform.
While some introverts may be shy, there is a big difference between shyness and being introverted. Shyness is a facet of social anxiety and the fear of rejection while being introverted is the ability to be at social function without the need for complete social interaction. For example, if the introvert was at a party, he or she can easily have conversations with many people, but often chooses not to.
The introvert can have extroverted tendencies while still remaining to be an introvert. Many introverts will pick and choose the time and place to be extroverted, such as waiting in line at the grocery store. In this situation, the conversation is limited and there is no long term commitment to continue the conversation, allowing the introvert to have social interaction without being forced into it. Within minutes, the introvert will once again find the tranquility of being the observer.
Within the solitude, the introvert finds much time to reflect on life. He or she will have a small group of close friends and will feel comfortable being themselves around these people.
The extrovert will feel uncomfortable when there is a small break in the conversation while the introvert understands that sometimes words do not need to be spoken to appreciate the company of the person they’re with. A hug and a smile speak louder than words for the introvert.
The introvert is amused by the extrovert and will observe their mannerisms. An introvert will tend to be on the outside of a group, looking within.
Introverts prefer to watch, listen and observe and don’t talk very much but when they’re with people they feel close to, they will openly talk about things that they’re passionate about.
Many people within the spiritual and metaphysical genres are introverts and often look within for answers. They are more apt to understand the principle of oneness and how we are all connected on a deeper level than the extrovert, who looks for physical approval.
Introverts tend to use the right side of their brain and often are often musically or artistically inclined. They may also be poets or philosophers and can easily see outside the box.
The introvert will question the origins of what society has told us to be the truth and unlike a scientist, he or she does not need empirical data to maintain his or her own beliefs. The metaphysical fields often attract the introvert because of this.
Inner reflection is commonly used by the introvert as he or she will look within for answers versus what he or she may have been taught. The introvert will use discernment as he or she weighs what has been learned externally versus what he or she feels resonates as the truth within.
Introverts are often Empaths as well. Their sensitivity to how other people feel tends to be heightened as opposed to the extrovert who is more consumed with how others are perceiving himself or herself.
Extroverts may also be highly spiritual and will display their spirituality more openly than the introvert. They are easily able to talk to anyone about spiritual and metaphysical topics while the introvert will pick and choose who he or she will talk to about these issues.
The bottom line: despite being only 25% of the population, the introvert will rarely change their attitude or personality to appease others, with the exception of their employment. Many introverts have learned how to be “temporary extroverts” but in the end, their comfort zone brings them back to be an introvert. While society will continue to make the introvert feel like an outcast, the introvert will not be persuaded by peer pressure or conformity in order to appease others because he or she already knows that the truth is within.
If you are looking for simple ways to transform your life as an Empath or just ways to stay in control of how you feel,click here or on the image opposite.
If you are an Empath, you will know, only too well, how easy it is to pick up coughs, colds and other ailments off those we spend time with.
Empaths often get twice as many ailments as those who do not pick up the energy of others. So, why is that?
An out of balance Empath, especially one who has absorbed the stresses of others, as well as having their own to deal with, need only briefly be in the presence of someone with the beginnings of a sniffle to pick up a full-blown dose. Of which, the ensuing symptoms tend to be worse than the original carrier.
The problem is, many Empaths are not aware of their own imbalances. Some become so used to feeling ‘out-of-sorts’, after picking up stress from others, they do not notice their body becoming weaker and their immune system less resilient.
I have discovered the best way to stay in balance, as an Empath, is to have all bases covered. And what I mean by that is to take care of our physical, mental and energetic bodies (body, mind and spirit).
In this post I am focusing on balance of the body (immune system) in the way of supplements.
Heard of the saying: ‘like attracts like’ or ‘like increases like?’ Well, it works in all areas of life. Generally those who regularly pick up the negative emotions of others, often feel like crap. When you feel crap you want to eat crap: fast food, stodgy and sugary food. Basically the type of food that has little in the way of nutritional value. So you feel rubbish, eat rubbish, feel more rubbish… and get no nutrients.
Nutrients are our safeguard against illness because they help keep the immune system strong.
I came to realise, first-hand, the importance of supplements, through unintentional trial and error over the years. In my haphazard approach to taking vitamins and minerals (taking them for 6 months then non for the next), I found that when taking supplements I had far less immune-system-related illnesses than when not taking them.
There is much controversy over the effectiveness of supplements, especially synthetic ones, and whether they actually work. Many experts argue that a healthy, balanced diet is all we need for optimum nutrition levels. But, even with the healthiest of diets, do we really know how nutritiously balanced our food is?
It is known that our soil is no longer rich in minerals, as it once was, which ultimately affects the mineral content of the fruit and vegetables grown in it. The ripe and brightly coloured fruits on our supermarket shelves may have travelled half-way around the world, and are already months old, before they get to our kitchens. Meaning a much lower vitamin count than if delivered to the supermarkets within hours of being harvested.
It is easy to get reliable information on the web regarding supplements and their benefits. And it is well worth doing the research.
Depending on your areas of weakness will depend on which supplement you should be taking, but I have found the following to be a good all-round elixir:
A Good Multi-Vitamin.
Extra Vitamin C(especially if you get many colds).
Omega 3, found, for example, in fish oils or organic coconut oil (a diet consisting of a ratio 3-1 of Omega 6 to Omega 3 is a good balance. However, the average Western diet consists of a ratio of about 15-1 or more, through the high usage of vegetable oils in processed foods).
A Good Multi-B Vitamin.
A Good Probiotic (especially if you suffer from a sensitive digestive tract).
Digestive Enzymes (to be taken with meals) which help break down food and extract the nutrients. Especially beneficial to those who suffer with indigestion or low stomach acid.
A Good Multi-Mineral.
The reason I recommend multi-vitamins and minerals combined, as opposed to individual supplements, is because many vitamins and minerals work together. For example, magnesium and calcium work together. If you take high doses of only magnesium, your calcium levels could become unbalanced, which might lead to other health problems.
If you have any underlying health conditions, speak to a health practitioner before using supplements.
I write these posts with the intention of helping Empaths help themselves. But we need to take responsibility for self. What works for one won’t always work for another. So in that respect take what feels right to you and discard the rest. Empaths tend to get that ‘gut feeling’ (the knowing) when something is not right.
Also, if you want to learn more about how changing your diet can transform your life as an Empath click here
Or if you would like to support me and my work please donate here.
Click on the picture opposite if you want to discover how your diet affects your Empath life and how, by making some simple changes, you can transform your life.
Empaths tend to be hardwired for learning and are often on the lookout for new ways to help them find balance. By discovering your unique dosha type it could be that last piece of the puzzle you were looking for.
I have long been an advocate of the healing powers of yoga on the body and mind. So much so, I trained as a yoga teacher.
A part of my yoga teacher-training was devoted to the study of Ayurveda: an ancient healing practice and sister science to yoga, in which we discovered how our body constitutions, known as the doshas, affect our lives.
The meaning of Ayurveda roughly translates to ‘the science of life’. Its aim is to bring balance and health to both body and mind. This is achieved through various Ayurvedic methods. But one essential element is discovering what our dosha type is.
Each individual dosha type determines how and what we should eat, what type of exercise is more beneficial, it even determines our temperments and the emotions we are more prone to experience. Each of which can affect how we show up in the world as Empaths!
It is said we are all born with one basic constitution (dosha) which are known as either: Kapha, Pitta, or Vata.
80% of us are born with one primary dosha and the other 20% will have a dual-dosha or even tri-doshic type.
Dependant on your type will depend on what you experience in life and even what diet you should consume:
For example, a Kapha type who:
Tends to be on the heavier side
Dislikes the cold
Puts weight on easily
Is sluggish
Can have oily skin
Suffers with excess mucus
Tends to be laid back
A diet consisting of lower-fat, low-sugar, no-wheat products and plenty of spicy food is recommended.
A diet consisting of sweet, warm, moist and oily foods is recommended (not processed food though).
Pitta types tend to be:
Medium size and weight
Can eat a lot without weight-gain
Often suffers with thinning or fine hair
Are good decision makers
Can be short-tempered
Witty and often outspoken
Have high energy levels
Foods good to balance pitta are coconut oil, olive oil, rice, barley, oats, sweet fruits, asparagus, cucumber, courgette, cooling herbs and spices, and organic chicken
What Works for One Type Doesn’t Work for Another
It goes against the grain of what the Western world promotes, in that the same healthy diet is beneficial to all.
A food which is incredibly healthy for one dosha type, may not be so good for another.
I have included a link further down for you to discover your own unique dosha type.
So how does this information help an Empath?
Finding your dosha certainly won’t take away your Empath woes. But when we discover what is best for our individual doshas it is another step towards overall balance.
Empaths take on so much and can spend much of the time feeling exhausted just from dealing with external energy. But if we know that we have balanced our body, mind and spirit through eating, drinking and exercising according to our type it will make life easier and happier.
Also by finding your dosha type it will help you understand to which emotions you are more prone. Which will ultimately help you navigate your way through life!
These days we can not afford to get ourselves any more out of balance than we already are. If we are not physically in shape and are not doing what is best for our type then it leaves us vulnerable.
If you would like to uncover many more amazing ways to find balance as an Empath Click here
If you are keen to discover your unique dosha type you can visit:
Chopra Dosha Quiz A questionnaire which will determine which type you are.
When answering the questions it is best to cast your mind back to late childhood and early adulthood, because this is when you were most likely your true dosha type: before you got imbalanced from a stressful lifestyle, wrong diet and exercise et-cetera.
There is a wealth of information on both websites about your dosha type and what foods to eat, or to avoid, to balance it/them. You can also discover how much exercise is beneficial to your type and whether eating your food hot or cold should be a consideration.
If you get chance, visit an Ayurvedic practitioner who will give you a reliable diagnosis of your dosha type.
Did you know that random, or unexplained, sinus pressure or blocked sinuses can be an indication of an imbalance within one’s masculine and feminine energy?
There is clear evidence that a sift is happening within the balance of, what was, an overly dominant masculine world. The feminine certainly seems to be rising. So, it is hardly surprising that we are seeing many people suffering with nasal problems such as a blocked or runny nose, sinus headaches and nasal pressure (even out of the hay fever season).
All this nasal pressure, amongst the Sensitives of the world, could be a sign that a re-balance is indeed in the process of happening. But let me explain why…
Whilst studying in India for my yoga teaching, we learnt how pranayama (ancient breathing techniques) rebalances the physical and energetic bodies, which includes the chakras and nadis. And how, by regular practise, one could balance their masculine and feminine energy.
Before we go any further, for those of you who are not familiar with chakras and nadis, I shall give a brief overview of the energy body:
As well as the physical body, we have an energy body known as the pranic sheath. Within our pranic sheath there are over 72,000 spiritual currents or energy nerves called the nadis which correlate with the nerves in the physical body (in acupuncture they are known as meridians). To get an idea of what the nadis look like visualise a huge plate of cooked spaghetti, with strands running in and out and overlapping.
A point where many nadis accumulate is known as a chakra.
It is said, we have 14 main nadis, of which I’m going to cover 2: the Ida nadi and the Pingala nadi.
The Ida nadi governs the feminine, left side of the body, which in turn activates the right (visual, intuitive and creative) side of the brain.
The Pingala nadi governs the masculine, right side of the body and activates the left (logical) side of the brain.
Signs you have a poor functioning Ida nadi (femine energy) are: extreme coldness, depression, low mental energy, sluggish digestion, and a blocked left nostril.
Signs of a poor functioning Pingala nadi (masculine energy): excessive body heat, quick temper, itching body, dry skin and throat, excessive appetite, excessive physical or sexual energy, blocked right nostril.
When the left nostril is dominant (more airflow passing through nostril) it means the right side of the brain is more active and when the right nostril is dominant, the left side of the brain is more active. The dominance of each nostril should change throughout the day.
Now, here is where things get confusing: Although the left hemisphere of the brain is masculine the left side of the body is feminine, and the right hemisphere of the brain is feminine but the right side of the body is masculine. So when you are classed as being left-brained the right side of your body is usually dominant and vice versa… Phew! Explaining that just gave me brain-ache!
You may have heard the saying that when someone is known to be left-brained (masculine) they tend to be logical, driven, analytical and fast-paced. The left side of the brain is associated with aggression, physical strength, control and ego.
And with the right brain being associated with creativity, inner-strength and intuition, those who are right-brained (feminine) tend to be are artsy, sensitive, nurturing and easy-going.
Empaths and Highly Sensitive People tend to be right-brained.
Here’s a quick check to see which side of your brain is more dominant:
Block your right nostril with your thumb and breath through the left, now swap over and block the the left nostril and breath through the right.
Which side was the dominant?
If your left nostril was dominant it means the right hemisphere of your brain is more active.
If it was the right nostril, that was dominant, then your left brain is more active.
Dependant on which side is active/dominant will depend on how well you fare in certain tasks.
If your right nostril is dominant it’s a good time to do physically challenging activities, when the left nostril is activated it’s a good time to be creative, meditate or reflective.
If you find your nostrils are often blocked or painful, without any apparent cause (i.e. cold, allergies or other irritants), it could be a sign that your masculine and feminine energy is off-balance or that you are reacting to the ‘shifting energy of the world’. It might also indicate that you have problems within your energy body (read more here to see if your energy body is weak or damaged).
As an Empath, it is interesting to observe how the sinuses are affected by those around you. Because Empaths are often overly-affected by other people’s energy it can also affect their masculine and feminine energies. Notice what happens to your sinuses when around certain people, especially those who are overly masculine or feminine.
To help balance your masculine and feminine energy, there is an excellent breathing technique you can use, called Nadi Shodhana. Otherwise known as alternate-nostril breathing, when practised regularly this breathing technique helps balance the ida and pingala nadis : Click here for instructions
If you have an imbalance within your masculine and feminine energy you may also be suffering with a damaged energy field and leaky aura. Learn more about this condition here. If this is the case, you will always struggle to spend time around others, until you work to repair it.
Hope this post may help you on your Empath journey.
For Empaths and Sensitives, it is a challenge to stay grounded as we are constantly being bombarded with negative, external, emotions. Even if we stay home and don’t venture out of our personal sanctuaries, our empathic antennas are picking up pain from the outside world. Because of this we can easily become consumed with depression, listlessness and apathy and lose sight of what our roles here are to do.
What will help with that?
Staying grounded!
All of the following grounding techniques have been tried and tested by yours truly. I can attest to the benefits of them. Try them out and see what works best for you.
To see maximum benefits, remember to swap and change your grounding techniques regularly. We are constantly shifting and changing and this means our grounding techniques should too.
Here we go:
Change your thoughts:
Many of us help create our life situations with the thoughts we keep, especially dark, repetitive ones. From the second a negative thought pops into our head we only have a matter of moments before its settles in and changes our mindset from positive to negative, once this happens, one bad thought after another keeps rolling in.
The best way to avoid repetitive thoughts is not to indulge in them in the first place. When a dark thought pounces, change it, immediately, to a good one. Sounds simple, it’s not. It can be difficult, but we do have a choice about what we think. We can allow our thoughts to rule us or we can rule our thoughts… Change your thoughts change your life! See meditation below…
Water:
The body is made up of 75% water (some body tissue even contains 95%), so it will come as no surprise that this is way up there on the self-healing scale. Many of us are unaware of just how dehydrated we are. An insufficient supply of water creates problems with the functioning of our body, affects our well-being, appearance and accelerates the ageing process.
Most of us should be drinking at least 8 glasses of pure water a day, just to replenish what our body loses naturally through sweating, urination etc. The heavier we are the more water we need.
If you type, ‘the healing powers of water,’ into any search engine you will get hundreds of pages worth of information on the subject, but by far the best I have so far come across is the site of Dr F. Batmanghelidj M.D. who is a pioneer in the discoveries of the healing power of water. He has written many books on the subject, the most renowned being, The Body’s Many Cries for Water. He reveals many of his findings on his website www.watercure.com. Here you will find an abundance of well-researched-data on how water can heal the body and how to consume it safely, without flushing our necessary minerals from the body. And, unlike many other sites, he does not charge for the information.
His mantra is, ‘You’re not sick; you’re thirsty. Don’t treat thirst with medication’. And it has been his life’s mission to get this word out to the world.
There is an old religious saying (or at least it was used by many God-fearing Christians in yesteryear), ‘Cleanliness is second to godliness.’ I used to believe the saying was a ridiculous, bully-tactic for making young children clean behind their ears (which in those days it probably was), but now I can see it from another point of view. Water washes more than just dirt away; it has the power to cleanse our energetic body and clear negative energies. If you’re sceptical, try this when you come home from a hard day at work: Instead of reaching for the wine, jump straight in the shower and see what a lifting effect it has on you. Combine it with the healing power of salt and you’re onto a winner.
To find out more on how you can get medicinal benefits from taking sea salt with water (the correct quantities), please refer to Dr F Bamaghelidji’s website www.watercure.com
Sea Salt:
It is said that the ‘father of medicine,’ Hippocrates, was amongst the first to discover the, almost magical, healing ability of sea salt, after noticing how quickly seawater would heal wounded fishermen’s hands.
Not only is sea salt a great medicinal healer, it is deeply purifying. It has the power to draw out and dissolve negative energies from the emotional and physical body. This is especially helpful if your day involves interacting with others, where too often you end up picking their stressed or anxious energy.
The best way to get an external, daily, salt cleanse (if you don’t live near the ocean) is in a salt bath. Immersing the body for at least 20 minutes in salt water will get rid of any negative emotions picked up during the day. This is especially important for empaths who absorb negative energies like a sponge. For best results add 1 to 2 cups of sea salt to a warm bath (along with your favourite essential oil or a crystal. See below). If you don’t have time for a soak then another great option is a salt-scrub prior to showering. (You can easily make this from fine milled sea salt and oil). Not only will the salt clear unwanted energies, it will also leave your skin silky smooth and glowing.
Nadi Shodhana/Alternate Nostril Breathing:
Balance your inner masculine and feminine energy (which easily gets out of balance in these times) by doing alternate nostril breathing:
Sit comfortably with your back straight and eyes closed. Place the tip of the right thumb on the edge of the right nostril and the right, ring finger hovering over the left nostril. Closing off the right nostril inhale through the left for a count of 3. Close the left nostril then exhale through the right for a count of 3, inhale through the right for a count of 3. Close the right nostril and exhale through the left… this was 1 round of Nadi Shodhana, do 9 more then build up to at least 20. (If you are more of a visual learner there are lots of videos on Youtube for alternate-nostril breathing)
It is normal when beginning Pranyama (breathing exercises) to get a little dizzy, if this happens just resume normal breathing until it passes.
Exercise and play:
In the western world many of us turn to exercise for the benefits of weight loss and a toned body. However, exercise offers so much more: it can release pent-up emotions, remove impurities through sweat, enhances and uplifts moods, energizes and allows us to have fun. Instead of referring to it as workout-time, we should call it playtime.
When it comes to playtime do what you love. Some of you maybe stuck in a boring exercise routine that you do out of necessity rather than play. If this is the case, find something you love. What did you love to do as a child? Being out on your bike? Skipping? Hula-Hooping? Bouncing up and down on a trampoline? Horse-riding? All excellent forms of play (exercise). If you detested running and were no good at it, chances are it will probably be the same now. If you loved gymnastics then yoga will definitely be a great one for you to try.
If you don’t like rules, routines or set times then go freestyle. Make the rules yourself. Get the music cranked up and dance like nobody’s watching (which it’s probably best if no one is whilst throwing your shapes out). Dance, stretch and jump your cares away and get a sweat on. All you need is 10 minutes a day, but I guarantee if you’re doing something you love those 10 minutes will easily turn into 20, 30 or 40… Who needs a gym or a class?
Meditation:
This is a must if you have a busy head with endless mind-chatter and fearful thoughts. It will help you deal with stressful situations and give you clearer insight. There are many forms of meditation out there; it’s just a case of finding what suits you. If you’ve never attempted it here’s one to try:
Sit in a comfortable position with your back straight, close your eyes and, breathing through your nose, focus on your breath. Inhale for 3 seconds and exhale for 3 seconds. On the inhale feel your tummy expand and on the exhale feel it deflate (Note: when you first try this it is common to get dizzy or feel anxious). You will find, at first, your mind turns into a monkey and starts jumping all over the place, from one thought to the next, but just keep coming back to your breath. Start with a few minutes and build up. Between 10 to twenty minutes is usually good.
Creativity:
In a world of rules and routine, we seldom get time to be creative, but this is one of the easiest ways to revel in the feel-good-factor. When we create, from our passions or interests, it has an uplifting effect on our psyche and because we’re engaging in something we love, it keeps our minds away from dark thoughts and feelings.
Many will say that they’re not creative because they don’t see themselves as artistic. But you don’t have to be a master crafter or award-winning composer to indulge in creative outlets. Simply making a dance routine, writing a story or poem, arranging flowers or devising a menu, are forms of creativity. We all have a way to be creative, it maybe that you’ve just not discovered yours yet.
Chakra balancing:
We have 7 main chakras which are part of our energetic body. They are our centres of spiritual power that run the length of our body, from our root chakra (lower torso) to our crown chakra (crown of head). The chakras are whirling vortices of energy that are aligned with our endocrine system (organs which secrete hormones such as adrenalin, cortisone and thyroxine into the body), which if out of whack can create disease (dis-ease) within the body. The 3 best ways to self-balance our chakras is through: meditation, yoga or using crystals:
Yoga: The Five Tibetan rites is one form of yoga specifically designed to balance the chakras as well as short (10 to 20 mins max), kick-ass workout for body and mind.
Meditation: through doing either a guided, chakra meditation or just focusing positively on each one in turn will help keep them balanced. You can get guided meditation CD’s at Amazon.com
Crystals: (see below).
Yoga:
Many people say yoga is not for them, but it’s the very people who turn away from yoga that are the ones who need it most. Yoga serves anyone and everyone no matter what age or ability and it should be a staple in every person’s life.
There is a yogic saying that, ‘We’re only young as the spine is flexible.’ And because yoga works to create a supple spine it could be classed as an elixir of youth.
The very core of yoga is built on our breath. We breathe our way in and out of postures and for this reason yoga can be classed as a moving meditation. It stills and calms an overworked mind (which is why many will say it’s not for them because they fear the stillness) and creates a strong supple body.
There are many forms of yoga and there will be a fit for everyone. For those sporty types who love to work hard and build a sweat there’s Ashtanga or Bikram yoga. For those who need a gentler pace there’s Iyengar or Dru yoga.
The hardest part of yoga is getting on the mat, but once there your body will flow gracefully through the poses and thank you for it after.
Nature:
Being outdoors in nature has a healing and uplifting effect on all. If you work in a city with no access to parkland make sure you get out at weekends away from cars and air pollution.
Laughter:
As grown-ups we spend too much time being solemn and serious, and too little time having fun (especially in the current times). Do you remember the last time you had a proper belly laugh?
‘You don’t stop playing because you grow old; you grow old because you stop playing!’
We hear children laugh all the time. They don’t know how to take life seriously, it’s all about play and fun. We should all strive to stay childlike. To see the world in wonder and above all have fun and laugh. Anything that makes us laugh will make our spirits soar. It really is a therapy.
Crystals:
The healing power of crystals has long been known in many cultures, from Atlantis to ancient Egypt. Many ancients had crystal chambers that would be used to heal many an ailment.
Crystals can be used in conjunction with the chakras to help balance them and remove blockages. This can be done by matching the colour of the chakra with the colour of a crystal. For example: the solar plexus chakra is yellow so a good choice would be Citrine. The sacral chakra is orange so Amber could be used. And the throat chakra is blue so Blue-Lace Agate would work to balance it.
Place the crystal on the body, inline with the chakra. It is best to do this whilst lying down (crystals fall off otherwise) and perhaps do a meditation or listen to soothing music for as long as you need. (Click here for best grounding stone)
Red Base/root chakra: Red Jasper
Orange Sacral chakra: Amber
Yellow Solar Plexus chakra: Citrine
Green/pink Heart chakra: Rose quartz/Aventurine
Blue Throat Chakra: Blue-Lace Agate
Indigo Third eye chakra: Sodalite
Violet Crown chakra: Amethyst
Depending on your need (and on the crystal), you can put crystals in your bath, under your pillow, in your socks and use them in your meditations or just as a visual aide.
As with crystals the healing power of essential oils has been known through the ages. It is through the olfactory senses that much benefit is derived from the oils. The best all round essential oil is Lavender because, unlike other oils, it can be used without a carrier-oil and applied directly to the skin or put straight into your bath water (other oils can irritate the skin if used neat). Amongst its many benefits, Lavender is an antidepressant antiseptic, antifungal, it can even be used as a sleep aid. See the best oils for the Empath here
Love:
The most important self-healing tool we have is love… it makes the world go round. Doing what you love will uplift you more than anything else. The Beatles were onto something when they sang, ‘All you need is love!’ Unfortunately, we are humans, having a human experience, in a human body and love is often the last gift we tend to give ourselves.
Truth:
Truth is an all encompassing liberator and once you become an advocate your eyes will be opened to another world. Read this post to discover how to get to the truth of who you are as an Empath.
Finding the truth of who you really are as an Empath is one of the hardest things you will face whilst on this path of awakening.
If you are struggling with the current shift happening in the world, or with being an Empath, I guarantee, one of the reasons is you are not facing your personal truth.
The person you see in the mirror is an accumulation of many fear-based emotions, untruths, rejections and painful events, built up from your personal history.
Ever heard the saying, ‘We’re not really upset about what we think we’re upset about?’ It means we’re not facing the true cause of our pain.
SET YOURSELF FREE
Finding your truth is not an overnight process. It can take years. At least it took me years and I’m still uncovering new stuff all the time.
It was part of my journey to go the long way round, perhaps, so I could share the information here.
So how did I make the discovery? That the truth really will set you free…? Through journaling.
WRITE IT DOWN
When I was at my lowest ebb (part of my resistance to the a changing world and my Empath ways) I did not want to talk to anyone about what I was feeling inside. I believed it would make me appear weak and vulnerable. I felt frustrated that I was not in control of my emotions (When I discovered I was an Empath they made more sense) and, as I was not ready to talk to anyone about it, I had to find a way to offload. I did this by journaling.
I came across journaling, quite by chance during a quest to improve my writing skills. In her book, Writing down the Bones, Natalie Goldberg explained: to hone one’s writing ability one should write every day. The idea was just to put pen to paper and see what came out. This is exactly what I did… Continue reading →
1. Knowing: Empaths just know stuff, without being told. It’s a knowing that goes way beyond intuition or gut feelings, even though that is how many would describe the knowing. The more attuned they are the stronger this gift becomes.
2. Being in public places can be overwhelming: Places like shopping malls, supermarkets or stadiums, where there are lots of people around, can fill the Empath with turbulently vexed emotions that are coming from others.
3. Feeling others emotions and taking them on as your own: This is a huge one for Empaths. To some, they will feel emotions off those near by and with others they will feel emotions from those a vast distance away, or both. The more adept Empath will know if someone is having bad thoughts about them, even from a great distance.
4. Watching violence, cruelty or tragedy on the TV is unbearable: The more attuned an Empath becomes the worse it is and may make it so they eventually have to stop watching TV and reading newspapers altogether.
5. You know when someone is not being honest: If a friend or a loved one is telling you lies you know it (although many Empaths try not to focus on this because knowing a loved one is lying can be painful). Or if someone is saying one thing but feeling/thinking another, you know.
6. Picking up physical symptoms off another: An Empath will almost always develop the ailments off another (colds, eye infections, body aches and pains), especially those who they’re closest to, somewhat like sympathy pains.
7. Digestive disorders and lower back problems: The solar plexus chakra is based in the centre of the abdomen and it’s known as the seat of emotions. This is where Empaths feel the incoming emotion of another, which can weaken the area and eventually lead to anything from stomach ulcers to IBS (too many other conditions to list here). Lower back problems can develop from being ungrounded (amongst other things) and one, who has no knowledge of them being an Empath, will almost always be ungrounded.
8. Always looking out for the underdog: Anyone whose suffering, in emotional pain or being bullied draws an Empath’s attention and compassion.
9. Others will want to offload their problems on you, even strangers: An Empath can become a dumping ground for everyone else’s issues and problems, which, if they’re not careful can end up as their own.
10. Constant fatigue: Empaths often get drained of energy, either from energy vampires or just taking on too much from others, which even sleep will not cure. Many get diagnosed with ME.
11. Addictive personality: Alcohol, drugs, sex, are to name but a few addictions Empaths turn to, to block out the emotions of others. It can be a form of self-protection in order to hide from someone or something (external emotions).
12. Drawn to healing, holistic therapies and all things metaphysical: Although many Empaths would love to heal others, they can end up turning away from healing (even though they have a natural ability for it), after they’ve studied and qualified, because they take on too much from the one they are trying to heal. Especially if they are unaware of their empathy. Anything of a supernatural nature is of interest to Empaths and they don’t surprise or get shocked easily.
13. Creative: From singing, dancing, acting, drawing or writing an Empath will have a strong creative streak and a vivid imagination.
14. Love of nature and animals: Being outdoors in nature is a must for Empaths and pets are an essential part of their life.
15. Need for solitude: An Empath will go stir-crazy if they don’t get quiet time. This is even obvious in empathic children.
16. Gets bored or distracted easily if not stimulated: Work, school and home life has to be kept interesting for an Empath or they switch off from it and end up daydreaming or doodling.
17. Finds it impossible to do things they don’t enjoy: As above. Feels like they are living a lie by doing so. To force an Empath to do something they dislike through guilt or labelling them as idle will only serve in making them unhappy. It’s for this reason many Empaths get labelled as being lazy.
18. Strives for the truth: This becomes more prevalent when an Empath discovers his/her gifts and birthright. Anything untruthful feels plain wrong.
19. Always looking for answers and knowledge: To have unanswered questions can be frustrating for an Empath and they will endeavour to find an explanation. If they have a knowing about something they will look for confirmation. The downside to this is an information overload.
20. Likes adventure, freedom and travel: Empaths are free spirits.
21. Abhors clutter: It makes an Empath feel weighed down and blocks the flow of energy.
22. Loves to daydream: An Empath can stare into space for hours, in a world of their own and blissfully happy.
23. Finds routine, rules or control, imprisoning: Anything that takes away their freedom is debilitating to an Empath even poisoning.
24. Prone to carry weight without necessarily overeating: The excess weight, especially around the belly area, is a form of protection to stop the negative incoming energies having as much impact.
25. Excellent listener: An Empath won’t talk about themselves much unless it’s to someone they really trust. They love to learn and know about others and genuinely care.
26. Intolerance to narcissism: Although kind and often very tolerant of others, Empaths do not like to be around overly egotistical people, who put themselves first and refuse to consider anyone’s feelings or points of view, other than their own.
27. The ability to feel the days of the week: An Empath will get the ‘Friday Feeling’ if they work Fridays or not. They pick up on how the collective are feeling. The first couple of days of a long, bank holiday weekend (Easter for example) can feel, to them, like the world is smiling, calm and relaxed. Sunday evenings, Mondays and Tuesdays, of a working week, have a very heavy feeling.
28. Will not choose to buy antiques, vintage or second-hand: Anything that’s been pre-owned carries the energy of the previous owner. An Empath will even prefer to have a brand new car or house (if they are in the financial situation to do so) with no residual energy.
29. Sense the energy of food: Many Empaths don’t like to eat meat or poultry because they can feel the vibrations of the animal (especially if the animal suffered), even if they like the taste.
30. Can appear moody, shy, aloof, disconnected: Depending on how an Empath is feeling will depend on what face they show to the world. They can be prone to mood swings and if they’ve taken on too much negative will appear quiet and unsociable, even miserable. An Empath detests having to pretend to be happy when they’re sad, this only adds to their load (makes working in the service industry, when it’s service with a smile, very challenging) and can make them feel like scuttling under a stone.
There are many tried and tested techniques on this page that will help you better deal with your gift. Also, check out these 12 quick questions, you may also find the following posts helpful:
This above list has been compiled as a guide to help the unknowing Empath recognize his/her gift.
Empaths may carry many of the same traits but not all of them. One Empath may be able to eat meat whilst another may love being around antiques… we are all different. Some can override or block certain traits and some traits will come and go over the years (strengthen or weaken) as life circumstances change.
Hope this helps you on your path.
Diane
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When I didn’t know I was an Empath, I couldn’t understand why I felt all that I did. I know there must be hundreds of thousands of people struggling with the same ‘condition’, unaware that the bewildering, emotional ups and downs, they deal with on a daily basis, are not always their own feelings. They are picking up other people’s pain.
And I want to help with this. I want to help others understand that it is completely possible to feel another’s pain, even a stranger’s, as if their own.
If you don’t already know, an Empath is someone who is hyper-sensitive to many things, but mainly to the emotions of others. They can pick up the feelings of another and take them on.
An Empath can be perfectly happy and relaxed one minute, then enter a public place and within seconds feel anger, sadness or anxiety… emotions that are coming from others. If unaware they are Empathic, they may believe the cause of these feelings is a phobia of public places, a dislike of shopping, or even people.
Many Empaths become reclusive because it’s easier to stay away from the external stimuli than to deal with the bombardment of negative emotions they feel when in public.
Being an Empath is not something I tend to share openly with others. In the past I tried telling close friends about who I was or what I felt, but I just ended up feeling frustrated with their inability to grasp the concept. But that doesn’t mean I cannot share what I experience on here. Those who need the information will hopefully stumble across it.
When someone has not experienced something first-hand, it is difficult for them to understand it. And, as Empaths are not generally subject to discussion in common society, we may be seen as being a bit bonkers when we talk about what we feel, as opposed to having a very valid ability. This can make Empath life somewhat isolating.
Another reason I don’t tend to tell others of my abilities is because I don’t want them feeling uncomfortable around me. I’m sure they wouldn’t want to know that I know when what they’re saying is not what they are truly feeling or thinking. So, sometimes staying quiet is the best option.
Everyone who is an Empath has different empathic abilities. The two most common being: Picking up on others’ emotions and feeling the energy of places. For example: you may walk into a crowded room and sense a heavy tension, even though everyone looked happy (this is experiencing collective emotion). Or when entering a friend’s new house, which was old, but new to them, you feel a negative vibe, as if something bad has happened there (This is often residual energy. If the house was filled with arguments and angst the energy stays there. Likewise, when walking into a house that has been filled with happiness and love, to an Empath it can feel like the Sun is shining indoors).
Another unusual place Empaths experience weird feelings is on social media: I once fell into the trap of being a Facebook addict. It took me a while to understand why I always came away from a browsing session feeling flat, especially after reading posts by a people declaring their happiness and fabulous lifestyles. Then I saw it, it was the inauthenticity affecting me. As Empaths we feel fakery. When someone is stating how wonderful life is, when it’s quite the opposite, we feel that as an inauthentic vibe. Spend too long on social media outlets and it often becomes overwhelming.
The more in tune we become as Empaths the more we see the world for what it is. Reading newspapers becomes a challenge, especially the ones packed with lies, gossip and no real news. The TV can become unbearable, in particular any kind of programmes with violence or cruelty. Even watching reality-singing-shows are heart-wrenching. Seeing the judges quash the dreams of young hopefuls (whose main ambition in life is to feel special) and humiliate them, in the name of entertainment, is hideous.
There are many other ways in which Empaths find everyday life a challenge, which I intend to write more about in future posts. But if you are not sure if you could be classed as an Empath, here’s a list of 30 traits that can help you decide.
So if you’d like to find out more about being an Empath click the follow button on the sidebar.
I have often been asked questions such as: ‘how can I be of service to others without being drained?’ or ‘I want to help, how should I do it?’ 
It is incredible how quickly clutter builds within the home and the mind. 
the right nostril and the right, ring finger hovering over the left nostril. Closing off the right nostril inhale through the left for a count of 3. Close the left nostril then exhale through the right for a count of 3, inhale through the right for a count of 3. Close the right nostril and exhale through the left… this was 1 round of Nadi Shodhana, do 9 more then build up to at least 20. (If you are more of a visual learner there are lots of videos on Youtube for alternate-nostril breathing)
Empaths Empowered 